Post published by TheIndianVegeta

24/06/2019

Day1:

Intro: I am a indian male of age 26 year old. Heard about nofap community couple of months ago. Restarting my journey. Any help or suggestions are welcomed.

Last night I restarted my nofap journey. Since past two years I have tried and failed multiple times in this absolutely succumbed pmo multiple time.

Honestly speaking I left all my hopes of ever overcoming something that is killing my true self and my soul. More than that it’s a crime against your own body that has been gifted to you by god.

In Hinduism it is said that you are bestowed with a human body after being born in 84 million different forms (animals insects etc.). Was taught in our daily Sanskrit classes that even God seeks being born as a human. That what makes Hinduism different from all religion. But that is something I will write about some other day.

So last night after committing pmo I think a millionth time I was on brink of suicide. Yeah you read it correct suicide I was depressed, lonely, consumed in self pity, overthinking absolutely any thing blaming my self not only for the crime I have committed towards my own body but also not thinking about my family or future.

Let me sum up what I feel was wrong:

1. The ultimate excuse : “This is for one last time, look at her she is enjoying being banged by 5 black man?”-> Trust me if you look at it from a human stand point and read about most of these girls they were being forced to join this ugly industry whether its financial, past abuse etc instead of helping them we are becoming Web Predators preying on there bodies converted into pixels. Screen or pixels don’t have emotions but trust me real people do have if you read about these girls in porn.

2. I realized it killed my sensitivity and my ability to face daily life as well as long term problems.

3. My brain was fucked up: Yep this is something gifted to all humans that can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Rest all demons you face outside the world are secondary. But you will be screwed if your brain starts working against you.

4. Clue how you realize its working against you:

· Locking your potential

· If just a single thing goes south your panic alarm will alert you to pmo.

· Making pmo a scapegoat for all real life problems

· If you feel after starting a work or in middle of it : you don’t worth it? You wont be able to make it? Dude you are kidding me that guy is a fucking genius even he cant do it how you can expect me to do something.

· Procrastination and lethargy.

Now question is do I got all the answers about these questions: Honestly speaking no. Because I restarted my journey. But one thing that I realized if I stay on the same spot and hope for things to change . It won’t reality of today’s world is really sync with lines “World is your oyster”

There is good and bad both out there it’s up to you to choose until you do not make sure that you are in charge and responsible for yourself nothing is going to help you. Neither reading nofap journals nor installing a porn blocker.

So kindly wish me all the best for restarting this journey, and help me with your suggestion on how to overcome these odds.

The Indian Vegeta