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Post published by Simileven
Relapsed on day 24.
What a disappointment. I haven't felt so lonely and sad in a very long time. Helpless and without purpose.
Never again. I keep telling this to myself over and over again, but still I fail. Never again, is it wrong to say that?
Never again, this is what I long for, and I would pay loads for a guarantee to never fail again in a sexual way.
Never again, and even if I have to say it to myself over and over again.
Never again will I use porn. Never again will I sit in front of my computer and watch other people have sex.
Never again will I use my own hands, the hands God gave me, to please myself. They are not made for that.
Never again will I look at pictures of naked women, fantasizing about touching them, when God provided me with all I need.
Over and over again will I repeat this to myself.
Over and over again will I choose to fight instead of giving in.
Over and over again will I accept that I am weak in myself but God has already won the fight, he has provided me with everything that I need to succeed.
Over and over again will I pray for cleansing, for strength, for purity, for holiness.
Over and over again will I look at the Lord, not at myself.
"Never again!" over and over again.
Quit19 and Gods_princess like this.
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lucentio
Never again is a great goal. But you can only work on today. The past is history. Learn from it but don't beat yourself up over it. My goal is "not today". All I focus on is making it to midnight tonight. That is doable. Taking the time here to encourage you, my brother, also helps me reach my own goal. Im going to sign off here and listen to today's music and scripture reading on Pray As You Go. Will keep you in my prayer
Digger2, Salt & Light and Simileven like this.
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Simileven
Thanks for your comments! I agree, there's no point in beating yourself up. On the other hand I had a time when I didn't take sin and failure very seriously.
That to me is more dangerous than being harsh to oneself. But knowing that God forgives and still loves me, that is the thing one has to look at, I agree on that.