Post published by Mellow Mike
Hello all,
I have been a Catholic all my life. I have struggled with pornography and masturbation since I was 10. I am now 26. I have become so fed up with the losing battle I have had, as the problem has only gotten worse. It has even lead to fornication with strangers, and a relationship with someone who encouraged such behavior for over a year from 2015 to late 2016.
After I told her I did not want to continue having sex, we eventually broke up.
I was then overseas for all of 2017, and unable to attend mass due to the country I was living in and my work schedule. This marked the most rapid and sustained decline I’ve ever had in my life, and has carried over into my life even after returning home.
After being away from the sacraments for so long, especially reconciliation and the holy Eucharist, I have been unable to consistently get back into any semblance of my former spiritual life. Before, I would go to confession around 1-2 times a month depending on how frequently I masturbated, and rarely miss mass. Recently, I would go months on end without any sacraments, deliberately living in mortal sin and doing nothing about it, a perfectly complacent catholic.
I finally prayed for the grace to go to confession last weekend. I went on Tuesday morning, and attended mass right after. I need to make a radical change of lifestyle, and I hope this is the appropriate forum on NoFap to join as you all should have the perspective relatable to me, and not a purely secular one.
Thank you if you read through that whole mess, and God bless
planters1987, Rodion Raskolnikov, Kevoya and 2 others like this.
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TwoOfCups
Hi Mike. You are in the right forum. Sometimes I think we need to hit rock bottom before we are willing to make necessary changes in our life. But when we finally decide to make that change, we find that God is right there excitedly waiting for us. A year ago, I was at a very low point in my spiritual/religious life. I finally got disgusted with myself and turned to God for help. God has done some really amazing things for me in the last eight or nine months. I am sure he will do the same for you. I will be praying for you. Pace e Bene!
Deleted Account, Mellow Mike, Kevoya and 1 other person like this.
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Saskia Simone
Sacramentals might help you - wear a blessed crucifix or miraculous medal, a brown scapular or st Benedict medal. These small acts of faith are powerful and bring many graces. The church has many stories of conversion by such means. I am one of them. Sending love and offering prayers for you today x
Mellow Mike, Kevoya and Deleted Account like this.
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Mellow Mike
Cups: thank you for your relatable experience, I hope to be in your shoes in 9 months time. I know that feeling of disgust all too well. I appreciate the prayers
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Mellow Mike
Saskia: a blessing in disguise for me is that I started wearing a blessed scapular shortly after my unhealthy relationship. I felt terrible and I wanted something tangible to remind me of the man I should be. I am glad sacramentals worked for you, and I will pray for similar grace.
Saskia Simone likes this.
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Mellow Mike
Kevoya: thank you for the prayer advice. It is difficult for me to commit to longer prayers on a daily basis. I think I need to start small and build from there. However, I can attest to my spiritual highs while overseas to when I prayed the rosary daily for a week after I lost my phone...I’m hoping technology can assist me in doing better instead of hindering my prayer now.
Kevoya likes this.
