So, today, 19 hours in I relapsed and afterwards I took a shower, and almost cried and thought about my constant weakness, and I really need help
You just gotta keep on trying. there are no shortcuts. Learn from this relapse: what made you relapse? Did you watch porn? If so then download a blocker. DO you keep yourself active by staying busy, working out, running, socailizing, having an accountability partner can also help. Good luck!
WHY are you relapsing, mate? Boredom, loneliness, stress? Dig a bit and unearth the root of your weakness. You can't battle what's making you fail until you identify what it is.
You might wanna keep getting a gf off for the time being until you have gained a few weeks/months of rebooting. I say this because it can be a very lonely feeling during rebooting when you don't have a partner. If you have it in your mind that you don't need a gf until you are recovered, it could help you not keep thinking about not having a gf as not having a gf is a trick mind uses to justify relapses.