I don't know how to cope with all the stress. A lot of things have gone out of hand because those I love made wrong decisions against my advice and now they suffer. I wish I was never born.
Its so hard when those we love make decisions that are destructive to those around them and to themselves. Believe me i know what it is like, they not only did it against my advice, they yelled at me for giving them advice and when everything went horribly wrong they said i was right but still the cycle repeated itself over and over again. My faith is my rock which gives me strength. I can tell you i probably wouldn't be alive without it. This probably isnt what you want to hear but it is the best advice i can give and that is pray. And i can do that for you.
I prayed for 3 years and things only got worse. To the point I doubt the existence of any god or his power. I still pray sometimes. I will try to keep away from PMO as hard as I can because PMO only makes things worse (I don't drink or smoke, I am not free from suffering even in my dreams)
Unfortunatly i failed completly. No question about it this was a full relapse. I think it was because of those stupid no nut november youtube videos with the thumbnails. I was over confident in myself and didnt treat them with the cation that i really should have. Im going to start again despite me wanting to wait a little bit before starting again because i know if i give in more it will only get worse.
one day has passed again, the first day is so hard as im constantly thinking i've already failed may as well continue. But i pushed through it. The chaser effect is real.
Don't worry bro Let's count the days again. Let's be more stronger than before . Overconfidence makes us to make mistakes. Btw I am with you For me it's Day 1.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger brother, I will pray for you. Pray for me so I have a relief from my stressful time.
Thank you, i apreciate it. I need to remember i need to fight just as much now as i did in the past and cannot accept those things that i know make me fall. Thank you for that, it means a lot to me. I will.
Man i failed again, everything is falling apart. I need to focus down and push forwards. I need to give myself back my sense of pressure. I know the temptation that caused me to fail and i got rid of that thankfully but it does show im still weak. I am going to make it back to 30 days this year.
going strong. sometimes it astounds me the life i used to live, and i can see it still has effects on me. the work we do on ourselves does work, if you keep coming back to it. don't know how many times i came back to old patterns, but every time i work on it and to whatever degree I succeed, with help from others, I start to adopt new patterns.
hit the 90. did some peeking at thumbnails the other day, and had a dream where a doctor came and told me this was unhealthy, dark, and gross sticky energy, and that the only way to heal is through God. (I am not religious, although I do study and practice spirituality from different traditions including working with sacred plant medicines) Thanks for being on this healing journey with me.
