It is slip no a relapse acording to the rules of nofap you didn't expose to much , be careful , the pmo it is trying to making a way to reach you.
Day 8. I didn't do an update yesterday, but am feeling good now.. Wanted to make the updates at the end of the night, but apparently I still have to work on this timing. I am feeling good today and inspired! So many things are coming together as I bask in the greatness of God, if you allow me to call it that way. Anyway keep up my brothers! it's going to be a wild ride!
no, it´s not a reset, but it´s a warning allright. you got to stay sharp around triggers brother, because next time you may not survive. see what you did wrong, and how you can improve. fishing and peeking are warning signs bro, you can still change course, but you got to act now, don´t wait.
And already a Hobbit. Good entrance brother . Now let´s see if you can keep up with us . Good luck!!!!
Checking in brotherhood The sun is shining and i feel good . Good sleep today, cold shower right after waking up, it´s the best coffee ever On the addiction department nothing to report, some urges here and there, some attraction to random town woman, but nothing serious. feeling very solid and determinated The overall spirit of our guild is very good, so congratulations to all . Checking out!! Have a great day my friends Here´s another interesting excerpt from "your brain on porn", page 55/56 "As yet, only two studies (both published in 2014) have isolated and analysed the brains of internet porn users. The first of these looked at users who were not addicts: "Brain Structure and Functional Connectivity Associated With Pornography Consumption: The Brain on Porn". It was published in the prestigious JAMA Psychiatry journal.[91] In this study, experts at Germany's Max Planck Institute found: 1. Higher hours per week/more years of porn viewing correlated with a reduction in grey matter in sections of the reward circuitry (striatum) involved in motivation and decisionmaking. Reduced grey matter in this reward-related region means fewer nerve connections. Fewer nerve connections here translates into sluggish reward activity, or a numbed pleasure response, often called desensitisation (more on that below). The researchers interpreted this as an indication of the effects of longer-term porn exposure. 2. The nerve connections between the reward circuit and prefrontal cortex worsened with increased porn watching. As the researchers explained, ‘Dysfunction of this circuitry has been related to inappropriate behavioural choices, such as drug seeking, regardless of the potential negative outcome.’ In short, this is evidence of an association between porn use and impaired impulse control. 3. The more porn used, the less reward activation when sexual images were flashed on the screen. A possible explanation is that heavy users eventually need more stimulation to fire up their reward circuitry. Said the researchers, ‘This is in line with the hypothesis that intense exposure to pornographic stimuli results in a downregulation of the natural neural response to sexual stimuli.’ Again, desensitisation is common in all kinds of addicts. To sum up: More porn use correlated with less gray matter and reduced reward activity (in the dorsal striatum) when viewing sexual images. More porn use also correlated with weakened connections to the seat of our willpower, the frontal cortex."
Bros, i have succumbed to The One. Today I have a meeting with my PhD advisor. I get really anxious on Thursdays. Other than that, I woke up with a strong sexual desire. I resisted once, twice, in the third while preparing the material. I relapsed. It doesn't justify it, but one little thing led to another. I'm embarrassed, but I want to be someone better and I'm willing to start day 0 again.
Day 44 and almost done with reading FOTR. Such a great experience. Never reached such a streak. I feel blessed.
I know that feel, being so much under pressure that you grasp anything to escape your feelings. I encourage you to write down your feelings more regularly in order to start acknowledging them. We’re all in the same boat, go for it
failed, but not all the way. Found myself a couple of time throughout the day just going into P sites, every time was just a couple of seconds. At first I told myself that It’s like fishing. But no. it was more edging than anything else. In the end I did the one thing I said I would not do, I want into the bathroom with my phone and edged. I wasted some time in there doing the good old fashion combo, edging and telling myself what a piece of shit I am for watching porn and that I should just stop. After some more time the good side has won and even though I’ve failed. At least it was just PM and not PMO… thank God for small victories. So I’m back to square one. And for the first time I’ve got a new mark on my calendar. Up until now I’ve had a red X for good days and a black line for every PMO of the day. Today I’ve made a black dot to mark that I’ve just watched porn so it’s not a good day, but It’s also not PMO. The fact that it’s the first dot in the calendar is great. It is the first time I’ve managed to stop before falling all the way. I am mostly sad about breaking two promises to myself. I’ve watched P in Berlin and I’ve watched P for the first time on my brand new phone. Now I just feel that it would be easier for me to go there again after I’ve already crossed that bridge. I know what tipped me. Stuff in the move has not been going according to plan and it is getting harder. And at the same time I want to be the strong one to help my girlfriend in her struggle with stress before she starts school. So I don’t want to show her how much I am stressed myself. PMO is not the answer, But relocation is just so much stress and it made me miss out on my weekly therapy session. I hope you are all doing better then me. Let the journey begin again.