Hola, Hello! my name is Jorge I have this issue with porn I watch it everyday and it is getting harder and harder to achieve the place where I feel satisfied with this activity . I don't like going on dates , I sometimes have the chance to date girls but I always make some excuses( Like I'm ugly, I am not very tall, there are other men out there, I cannot rely my emotions to others, I don't have enough money, why a girl would look at me). I have never had sex and at this point I have lack of confidence and I'm always afraid of the possibility of trying sex and don't be able to date more girls or try something that I won't experience anymore, that's why porn is kind of attractive 'cause it's just one click away. I have hard time focusing on my goals in life and sometimes I feel so bad that just masturbate and don't go out to do sport or to engage in social activities, in someway being around people (especially woman) is kind of hard to me. I masturbate also when I feel bored . With porn I feel socially awkward I find hard to date girls or to maintain connection after first date. I start this challenge of nofap I want to get rid of porn and sex , I want to go back to my academic and intellectual goals. I plan to use all the help that I can get here and also do meditation, programming, guitar playing, sport and try to go out with people (just for fun not to engage in sort of sexual or romantic stuff). What do you think can you add or share if you are going/ or went through the same ? SORRY FOR MY ENGLISH, I HAVE SPANISH AS NATIVE TONGUE
Hi Jorge, Im glad you made it here. Im a software developer myself, so I totally know how good it is to code, fap, then keep coding. The best thing about you is that you know what your problem is. You lack self-confidence not because you dont have enough reasons to be confident, but because you don't want to be in the position to be evaluated by someone. I passed by this before. Maintaining a good nofap record WILL absolutely push you towards finding the good things in dating. You will be very confident when having sex because you're sure your balls have plenty to give So set yourself a target record, and go for it. I just started mine, and I wish we can do this, for ourselves. It's not going to be easy. Your mind will tell you that there's nothing that can make you feel good, relieved, or comfy unless you fap. It is worth the struggle. And whenever you feel like doing it, remember why you started. You want to find the real man in you. I wish you all the best, and I'm sure you'll be a great fapstronaut And btw, your English is great!
Thank you a very positive mesasage, I started and feel like can get better life by quitting this addiction.
Genial tener un hermano latinoamericano aquí, seguiré luchando por sacar esto de mi vida de una vez por todas gracias por el apoyo y ¡ vamos con toda !
Que bien hermano hechale ganas en tu proceso, si se puede yo llevó 22 días sin masturbacion y sin porno no es fácil pero se puede solo create metas y se muy disciplinado detecta las áreas donde seas más vulnerables y atacalas , saludos
Welcome Jorge, I understand where you are coming from. I to had very little confidence in myself. Here is a little trick to help you out, it may take some practice to get really good at it but it will help. When you are feeling down about dating ask yourself what makes you a great guy and worthy of this girl, your mind will actually come up with reason that will boost yourself up and help build your confidence, also say one good thing about yourself in the mirror everyday then after it gets easier to do so start saying something new every time you walk past your reflection this will help you be more positive toward yourself.
wow thank you I will start this routine saying something nice to myself everyday, I've never been in some way interesting to girls the only thing that in some way is good about me is my intelligence and dedication but what supposed to be my number one ability sometimes fails poorly. I've been so bad with the confidence that I gave up with girls (besides I don't know many girls in college or outside college ,I study an engineering major) , hope this will get better over time. Thank your for your words, really appreciate it.
Hi Jorge, My story is a lot like yours. I am 19 and learning engineering in college. I have anxiety around girls and I believe that it is the result of porn. I know we can get through this!
Trust me I know the feeling of your number one ability coming short for you. My advice is a perfect example of that. I can give anyone the best advice on the planet, but yet I can seem to give myself any at all. But on to better things lol, don't look at anything as a failure unless it makes you completely give up. With the girls ease into it just sit down and simply ask a question. Smile and just try to start a mini conversation in the line for checkout at the store. I know it may sound weird but it will help give you some practice. Second college is so easy to get to know other people. Just join a group or activity, this will also fill up some time and help you with the urges to give into this addiction.
Hey man, let's leave this addiction and let's become the engineers of the future. Hope after time the things with girls will get better.