Checking in @MixerAwersome @HiddenWarrior I meant that I've been on the bad path for so much time and went on such a bad level that now I am actually not comfortable on the good path, because it's like it is not me. Like a little voice inside my head telling me, that it's not me this one. The real one was the old one. This one will cause me suffering. At least that's what I fear and sometimes hold me back.
I can relate in a sense when I wasn't good in terms of my religion. Looking back it was a completely different version of me, disrespectful, arrogant and lazy. When I look back and think what I did was fun, I also try think of the harms if what I did to people.
Relapsed yesterday and today. But that was the longest I’ve gone in a while so that’s good. (Just checking in, I reset after 4 days so that means we keep going with the duel right?) @HiddenWarrior
Made it through today. Was kind of lazy but did a light workout and read a lot, so it wasn't necessarily a zero day. 1 day at a time right? I started using an app called timecap to track my progress down to the second. Its 24 hours behind because I started it at midnight today but my actual streak started at midnight yesterday and I can't seem to change the start time so I just need to add 24 hours onto it mentally. Regardless, I find it a lot better to track the exact amount of time rather than waiting a whole day to see progress go up.