This can happen during a reboot, especially if you have used PMO in the past to drown out and numb yourself to negative feelings. Learning how to deal with these feelings in healthy ways is a big part of your reboot. Starting a regular meditation practice is key here, imo.
You are spot on, I have been numbing myself for 40 years. The newness to all of this is scaring the crap out of me. Feelings! I do know how to meditate, probably a good time to restart my practice. Thanks for the input. J
Yes it can be very scary at first. You'll see a lot of darkness inside. But just remember that those feelings are not you. Meditation can help with this because it allows you to see how crazy and chaotic your thoughts processes are and disidentify with them.
If you haven't tried meditation before however, it might be difficult, and you may want to start with changing your negative thought pattern into positive ones using tailored affirmations. Write down a list of memories that are emotionally powerful to you and disturb you. Then next to them write down some advice you imagine you would get concerning that problem from a wise friend.
If you feel a lot of shame, for example, you may recall a situation that was particularly shameful, then write down in the affirmation column "I can't change the past, but I can be a better person right here and right now." You can then repeat that affiration to yourself everyday to start changing your negative thoughts patterns into positive ones.
It happens. Hang in there. How you learn to deal with all that real life stuff is what makes a good person become great. You can do it. Almost all of the feelings are just fears. You know you're choosing the right path - keep it up.
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