Comments on Profile Post by Deleted Account

Honestly, answering that question honestly is difficult. I don’t want to lie to you CC-Chan. Having almost everyone despise and reject me has not been easy, ya? The weight of it grows as time goes on...

I have faith in God, it keeps me alive. He keeps me...the reality of that is terrifying & beautiful.

I’m trembling, my friend. Even though I know God has goodness planned for me, I am overwhelmed with the knowledge of what I may have to further go through to see the other side in anything other than my dreams.

I’ve been through similar things before. I’ll be okay. God is faithful.

These troubles are just my weakness. Peace should be with me even now, and always, but sometimes the test can be hard eh?

How are you?

Whats going on? Who despises and rejects you? Like are you speaking in your life apart from the forum?

Not to butt in, but it sounds like your family to me man. I know what that can be like.

Yeah CC-Chan, it’s non-forum life :) Most of my family has disowned me. Church-family too. The details are awful.

Sorry to hear that, @Omega. Family issues can cut deep eh?

Ya I figured..my life is the forum rn so I keep thinking everyone elses is too.
Why would they disown a sweety like you? lol (not flirting)

Yeah, the forum can be great, eh? But for me I also think it blinded me a little to my stark reality. Being away for so long, coming to face with it, I think it did me some good even if it was a painful glimpse.

Perhaps I was running away from that to be here with great friends like you that I was missing from life...

The crux of it is that I rose my voice to say that things had been wrong and I had been hurt by some specific wrongs.

Found out that the people I loved the most in the world were too proud to admit any fault, too weak of heart to believe they could be wrong...so they made me out to be the wrong one so they wouldn’t have to admit they had hurt me.

So I was put out into the cold Canadian winter with a pair of pants, a t-shirt & canvas coat. They didn’t care if I died.

I'm sorry, Senpai Letter..
I thought you were happier..I mean I knew all this stuff sort of, you've been out on the streets awhile and you made it seem like after a while you decided to stay there and was neutral..

Dont you have any family at all that you can stay with and get a job and get an apartment?

I’m sorry for being complicated, and for any false impression I may have made unintentionally. It’s difficult to relate how I really am even on the best of days :)

This is where things get weird. I believe God speaks to us today, and that He makes His will known to people in many different ways. So, while I have many conventional ways to get out of this, when I prayed I saw a different, and difficult, way.

I may have all kinds of flaws, but I know better than to disobey God when He’s made a way clear for me to take.

But just because it’s clear doesn’t mean it’s easy. Ideally, my faith would be strong enough to hold me through this with a smile all the way through. Then again, sometimes you have to be brought to see how much you are not to find out how much you can become.

Sorry if I misunderstood.
What is the way out or do you not want to share? I hope you do find a way out of this situation by God's help..

I may be been unclear, my fault :)

Way out = I could be making $80k a year tomorrow if I chose to go back to my old career. I’ve got other options too. I could get out of this so easily.

But, when I prayed and asked, “God, surely this all came upon by your hand, so what do you want me to do?” I saw His answer to go live by the ancient ways of a hunter.

Hm.. lets just leave what happened undecided..
:b
Atleast we're talking about it now.

Cool.. you gonna live in forest/jungle?Can I come with. F society :b

Aye, the Canadian Forest. Winter is going to be a real challenge.

As much as I’d love to have you with me, before I can entertain those kinds of thoughts I gotta make sure I can actually do this first. It may take me a few years to hone my survival skills.

Hmm, you ever seen Mr. Robot?

lol im jk, but i totally would leave society if i could.
I am worried though about you. I am pretty sure we all are. Especially in the Canadian winter..
:/ I hate hearing this.

No but I just read up on it and it seems awesome. What about it?

Yeah. Ditching this whole world is so very appealing, isn’t it? Everything is so screwed up.

I’m taking my time to make sure I’m prepared. I’ve managed to stash away a good 6 months of food, and am putting together an insulated trailer as a fall-back option in case things go badly.

It’s just taking so long. The days go by and with so many easy ways out I’m attacked by all kinds of doubt and fear.

F Society is quite a theme in Mr. Robot :P

Yes.

Why do you have to go into the forest :/ Is there a hospice for you to go to instead..

How would going on this mission help you get out of your current situation?

If I can live in the wild, catch & forage all my food...then what is rent and what are groceries?

What is home, then? Everywhere is my home. It is freedom.