Hi everyone, I'm brand new to this community and for the record it's the first time I've posted anything or even discussed my problems with anyone. From what I've seen so far, there's a whole load of amazing support material and people but I'm going through agony right now and I'm hoping writing about it will somehow make it better. I'm 38 years old but my story starts 20 years ago with my first girlfriend. I loved her dearly, a young infatuation love that's always been inside of me and never gone away. The reason I mention her is because this story has come full-circle.. I've had other relationships over the years but I've mostly been on my own and PMO has been a daily event. I've been very unhappy at times and a couple of years ago I decided to really turn myself around; you wouldn't recognize me now compared to then (cardio, diet, weight-training) and I've gone from being invisible to women to now getting enough female attention but my confidence remains low. Basically I hadn't realized how much of a rut I am now stuck in. I've had disappointing and embarrassing episodes with women over the years but nothing as traumatic as what happened this past weekend. My ex-girlfriend has recently split from her husband (it's at least 6 weeks so don't judge me on that and I'm not to blame for it) and we had been messaging for a while and had met up one time. 0030 Sunday morning, she rang me and wanted to come around. She's a complete whirlwind of a girl (and might be the completely wrong person for me but I'm not looking for judgement on that), and we were having sex within the hour but the inevitable happened due to lack of sensation... She appeared offended and I had to just say I think I had a problem due to wanking to much.. I'm now completely mortified! It's worse because I know so many of her friends and I can only hope it stays in the 'girls' world' but that is bad enough. We had an amazing couple of days together and I was truly happy and she stayed again on Sunday night. Things were better but I couldn't see it through.. The worst pain is that I don't know if I've blown it and my immature mind still tells me she's the one for me. It's not so straight-forward because she doesn't want a serious relationship, which I can understand because of what she is going through, so I'm not daring to push her in anyway. She's away next weekend = won't hear from her and now a single mom = hardly any free time so I'm just in limbo. it was going so well but this is such a dark-cloud. One self-analysis I have concluded on is the reason she is probably still such a big deal for me is that I have this problem, it's just I've avoided/lived with it most of my life. For the record. I have abstained (including the two weekend actual failures) for 5 days now out of pure depression and a hope that one day all may be fixed for me. As I said.. I don't know what I'm looking for on here but there, it's out..
Welcome to the Club! Let me tell you, you're not alone with your problem. There are ton of men (me included) who's desensitized their cock with too much masturbation and porn. Great news is that there's simple and effective cure for this problem: Stay away prom porn and masturbation at least 30 days, and your problem is, if not gone, at least much much smaller. Stay Strong!
Cheers dude. I'm just hoping I get a second chance with this girl, rather than her running a mile and considering me a freak
If anyone is interested, this tale is yet to be concluded but I think I've figured out the probable truth. Regarding this girl.. easiest to do this in bullet-points: - she contacted me several times, which could be weeks apart, whilst she was gearing up to split up with her husband - when she eventually did, she messaged me on the day to tell me she had left him and arrange to speak with me. She then didn't. - A full 6 weeks went by before I heard from her again and this was when she was drunk, at 0030 in the morning, when she promiscuously decided she was coming to mine for sex (she turned up with her phone-charger ffs..). I've already explained the disaster which then happened. - This is what has happened since: that weekend was about 2 weeks ago. For the couple of days following, we exchanged a few nonsense text messages. I eventually thought I'd get straight to the point and I texted 'I want to see you'. She eventually replied, but to sum up, she told me she was busy until the end of September! I haven't responded and we haven't communicated since. So here is what I think I have worked out: I was always 'plan B' and there is another bloke involved in this. It's all about the massive periods of not communicating with me in the first stages but particularly the statement of 'I'm busy for the next several weeks', which is a totally f'n arbitrary number. Well it looks like she wants to see if it works out with him but not completely burn her bridges with me although I think it's unlikely she will look back to me again. She's f'n cruel. Yes, I know I need to stay away from her (and even block her in all ways). I'm feeling vulnerable because of what happened and that she is armed to completely humiliate me amongst shared friends. I'm weak and have always held a candle for her because we were teenage sweethearts but I'm starting to come around to the idea that she really doesn't give a f***.
Dear Buddy, first of all: it's bullshit to say "going limp is a disaster". Nothing personal, i just want to make this clear. It's absolutely natural for a porn wanker to have erectile dysfunction. If you read my log, you will notice i did not had an orgasm or sex with my wife for about 6 years because of this. After changing my habbits (for approx. 60 days), i had sex. Since then, we had sex several times and ed is not an issue anymore. I never thought this could be possible. Change your habbits, stay away from p&m ad infinitum and you will have a healthy sex life. You will not even care about this single ed you had with this girl.
