I have been in Ibiza last week and I did have a lot of fun, it was my best holiday I even had. Even though I've been in that magic island, I just couldn't my completely free with my mind in picking up some girls. This social anxiety keeps burning my ass a lot and since I'm 20 years old, I wuold like to make a move to my social life (picking up girls and better friends) and also a better studying and boxing life. (I picked up a girl but we both really drunk and I personally don't like to pick up only if I'm drunk). I feel lonely right now because of all these problems I list to you even though I am on a straight. Why the fuck can't I be free and pick up girls? Why can't I be motivated to study and have a general better life? Someone can help me with some advices? I really swear since 27 July I'm not going to start the shit PMO cause is not worth it, I wuold feel so worse. Thank you for listening.
Do you like what it is you are going to study? You should work and do something that's leaves you feeling fulfilled. Also, one way to beat social anxiety is to become more social. Engaging in more social activity will help to decrease social anxiety.
okay man, lets deconstruct your post a bit there's a lot going on in it. first social anxiety. my personal advice when it comes to this is just get used to talking to people. the more you become accustomed to talking to new people the less social anxiety youll have. its like giving a speech. everyone is staring at you and your freaking out and cared shitless but after like 15 seconds once you get into your speech its all good. social interactions are very much the same way. don't put too much pressure on yourself just calm down, relax and just start talking to people. this also goes along with picking up girls. by the way no girl likes a guy that smells like a brewery... keep that in mind. loneliness well bud, this is a introspective question. why do you feel lonely? is it because you are intentionally isolating yourself? if its social anxiety that's holding you back then you should jump into the frying pan and embrace being uncomfortable in social situations so you can be better at it. there is just no substitute for when it comes to experience. you can read a book about being more social but until you actively become social that book will mean nothing. get experience! finally studying. as a math tutor I will say this... studying is a habit that must be formed you cant expect it to just manifest itself when you want it to. it takes discipline to get a study routine down. it also makes a difference about if you enjoy the topic your studying is also a motivation factor as well. but with a good study habit motivation to study will become secondary because you have created a strong habit instead of just doing it when your motivated. for college study I have always been told 3 hours of study per credit hour for an A. of course this is on average from a large distribution this was found true... anyway Good Luck
I would consider seeing a therapist as well. There might be more under the surface (and there is with everyone) contributing to what is bothering you than you realize. Sometimes changing your thoughts and behaviors works, sometimes it doesn't, which is why professional help exists. And also, just to normalize your experience, big change takes time. Think of how hard your brain is working to try and rewire years of experience. Stay patient, stay consistent, and keep reaching out for support when you need it.
as I understand the social anxiety is the problem. Maybe try to better understand yourself - start asking yourself why you feel miserable...and in the end dont treat life too seriously because you wont get out alive ..
