This week has been a rough week. I had to fight urges all day long, wether it was while browsing, taking a shower or even sleeping. I managed to avoid P & M for about 4 days (yeah, not very impressive) before relapsing in front of a low-class sex chat website. Not my proudest fap. I realized that it wasn't an "all of a sudden" thing, it was coming slowly and gradualy. At first a couple of nudes or artistic pictures to catch my attention. Then some more suggestive content to get me arroused. Then I pressed ctrl+shift+N and I was already lost. I noticed that as I was progressing, I tried to find more and more excuses for what I was going to do. "Just a glance", "It's just a quick look I can stop whenever I can", "I don't need that to feel good". After a few minutes starring at my computer screen, I had my D in my hand and it was too late. HOW TO PREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING AGAIN : I am going to install a filter on my computer to stop pictures of nudity popping on my screen all day. I will probably even stop following that Suicide Girl Facebook page I had on my FB for years that I considered "artistic & playful" before, and now causes me to engage in a mindless beast mode that I can't even stop. Also, I will try to be more open about my feelings with my gf. Last night I was really horny and wanted to tell her on the phone (we're not living together right now) and I didn't because I didn't want to bother her with my problems. Maybe if I had a chat with her, it would have gave me the motivation to continue without fapping. Anyway. Back to zero.
Your counter is back on zero but you still learned a lot. 4 days are amazing everyday without pmo is a good day.
Yeah sounds you made really good progress even though the relapse, about your triggers etc, and established a basic line of 'defence' how to get back to your goal etc, Today was a hard one today for me too, literrally... we can all learn from each other, and i think you are right, small 'innocently' percieved stuff can rapidly progress to hardcore stuff, Thinking of you, Hugs a
I'm starting to think myself I shouldn't be reading everyone's posts on here. Even when someone mentions things that are not really what I consider triggery, I think I'm starting to notice small and slight escalation of desire and arousal.
