What's good I'm 17 years old, 18 soon, and I am still a virgin. Mostly because I'm loyal in relationships an won't force a girl to do what she don't want an never been a player. Well I eventually got really frustrated that I was still a virgin an told myself I'm going to lose it soon. I started talking with this girl that I honestly had no feelings for, just sexually we would talk and send pictures to each other. We eventually met up a couple days ago an it seemed like it went alright until later. We smoked an we're laying in her bed an she started making moves. While she was doing it she says "trust me I know what I'm doing" and this foreplay happened for about 20 mins off an on. I got an erection off an on too, but I couldn't keep it so I started freakin. At 1 point she touched over my pants an then put her hand all the way down when my penis was lifeless an she kept touching it an it stayed soft. At one point I tried anything to get it up, I even started picture porn scenes in my head to try to get it up. I was so embarrassed an she seemed it to, an probably thought I had a small penis even though she's seen it hard an said it was bigger then any of her ex's. I just couldn't get it up ! So we gave up an I went home. I've been so depressed sense then because now a girl I actually end up do liking, cause when we kissed I for sure felt something, now she thinks I have a small penis an doesn't wanna talk to me now. And I feel embarrassed just texting her. I try to make excuses sayin "i can't wait till this medicine gets out of my system" as an excuse for why I couldn't get it up. When this happened I was on day 4 of NoFap, but I wasn't serious with it for awhile until now, cause I realize I can't deal with this anymore. Now I've been so depressed an so mad cause now I have to wait so long before I can get it up again, an as time goes by waiting I think, it's goona be even longer before I can lose my virginity. What should I do guys, what should I tell this girl an just I need help in general....
Hey, I'm also 17 and a virgin. As far as help goes, sorry I can't help you. I've never been in that sort of situation so I don't know what to tell you. One thing I can say is that I'm proud of you. It's great to see a fellow teen on nofap. We're getting a head start on the rebooting process. My question is how far along are you? Have you relapsed since the incident you spoke about? I'm on day 22. My record is 22 days and I've been doing nofap since August. I wish you a successful nofap journey.
IF you can get an erection to porn you don't have an ED problem you have a porn problem. Your mind is oversexed and freaking out. You're chasing sex, not because of a love of a girl, but because youre "tired of being a virgin". Perhaps you should thank your penis - it saved you from doing something stupid. THere is nothing wrong with being a virgin, but there is something wrong with your mentality. It's disordered. Forget everything you've learned from modern day society. If it was thought up in the last fifty years it's probably complete bullshit. that's where all your "masturbation is good for you" crap came from, where the "it's good to have premarital sex" crap came from, where "nothing is wrong with porn" came from. It's a load of bull shit. You really want to get better? Detach from modern social beliefs. Research what people believed about love and sex pre-60's. Right now your penis is saving you from some stupid life decisions.
Some facts right there brotha ,an it's just the environment I grew up in, I really am making some big life changes now.
Im 27,the woman of my dreams dumped me because of my ED, I can feel your pain bro, but its a learning curve , u are still young, just hang in there.
I had the same problem when I was 23 years old. I could FAP several times a day, no problem getting an erection. But with a young woman? Nope. Completely flaccid. You've made a good start by acknowledging the problem and seeking help. When I read noonoon's reply, my first thought was that he was harsh. That may be, but there's no sugar-coating the facts. I'm 54 years old now, and spending my whole life believing in all that modern society taught had serious affects: One destroyed marriage, no friends, problems forming relationships with anyone, depression. At best it had left me wanting to just be alone and FAP. At worst, it had me considering suicide. That's how pathetic it can get. My life has completely turned around the past couple of years, and is now the opposite of what it had been. I can thank the Catholic Church for that. I'm not suggesting you need to become a Catholic, I'm just saying that noonoon is right. You must reject modern social beliefs, they are destructive. Remember, you are not alone.
It happened with me too, I had to stop driving my car and FAP right in the middle of the road . Thats how pathetic it can get. I feel guilty and ashamed of myself for doing it, Im 27 ,.so i hope i can recover since now i know what is the cause of my problem.
Do not worry about being a 17 year old virgin. I think it is great that you were loyal and did not force it with your girl friend. That is being a real man. You controlled yourself; that is not easy. I cannot imagine that your friends and acquaintances are encouraging you in that type of behavior. Without PIED, it is easier to lose your virginity than to keep it. It may cost you some money and can bring big unexpected complications, but, if you are committed to it, it isn't that hard to lose something, even virginity. If you want something hard try getting it back after you lose it. Deciding you won't manipulate and use another person for what you want is hard. I congratulate you. Now, as to NoFap rebooting. If you commit and work hard, it will not take years for you to heal. In weeks you will see great results. You won't be well, but you should be able to perform with a real partner. In a few months of rebooting, you should be a new man. I won't say back to your old self, because you have matured into a man with PMO, and have never been a man without porn. That may leave roots so deep that it could take years to get them all out. In one sense, you will never be free of your memories of porn, but you will learn how good it is to be free of porn and be able to avoid it. You are doing this at a great time in your life. Many wait until they have PMO-ed for years and even decades. That is way too much life wasted. Fix it now and enjoy a good long life with a great partner and raise an awesome family. Do not look back; that is not the direction that you are going any more.
Since you're on this forum, I feel comfortable suggesting your GF dumped you not because of your ED but because of your porn, masturbation, orgasm problem, aka, lust addition. ED is the symptom not the disease. Again, if you can get it up to porn, you don't have an ED problem, you have a porn problem. Stop PMO for a month or two and see what happens.
Im getting morning wood which lasts for about 30 - 40 minutes. but when i wake up and leave my bed, my flatline begins and i feel no libido, no sex drive , feeling drowsy, lathargic and just want to go back to sleep, i feel no energy,. is this normal?
For a 17 year old male? Absolutely not. At your age, you are at your sexual peak. That means your body should be producing large quantities of sperm, putting your libido into overdrive. Have you spoken to your doctor, and ruled out the possibility of any medical condition?
How long have you been PMO-free? These are also signs of depression. It may be quite normal for a lust-addict 17 y/o who is depressed.
Sorry, not sure where I got the 17 y/o thing. I think we have to be careful of trying to wonder "is it normal"? Might be better to wonder "is it healthy"? For someone who has most probably been on a pretty serious lust-induced sexcapade over the last decade or so, it may be quite healthy. Who knows, maybe your body is trying to heal? Maybe you're experiencing withdrawl symptoms still. But, there may be other things at play. Do you think you might be depressed? Are you taking medicines? How's your nutrition? Stress? Etc. You might consider talking with a therapist who specializes in sex addiction. Or, even better, check out a Sexaholics Anonymous group in your area. There are many men with similar issues.
No stress, im healthy and do excercise everyday and i eat healthy. I never used to have morning erections but now morning erections are strong for about 30 - 40 minutes, but during the daytime i feel like i have hit the flatline again, i dont know what to do>
Let's see if I have the timeline correct: your GF dumped you "because of your ED". This dumping happened before NoFap. After your GF dumped you, you started NoFap. 21 days in and you are experiencing signs of depression. If that's your timeline it sounds pretty "normal" to me to have depression and ED, considering your circumstances. Perscription: 1. Continue NoFap. 2. Give heart time to heal. 3. Meet new woman and share genuine love without lust and porn.
I would say looking for help is a good start. If you're really concerned, seek some professional help. A lot of the time it's not very expensive. As i noted before, find someone who understands sex addiction.
@noonoon Perscription: 1. Continue NoFap. 2. Give heart time to heal. 3. Meet new woman and share genuine love without lust and porn. Yeah my Gf dumped me before Nofap, and then i started Nofap, And im seeing improvement by morning wood for 30 - 40 minutes, which i never experienced in the last 10 years and i feel so happy for this morning wood, But my question is, why during the daytime i hit the flatline ? Im 21 days into nofap
21 days into nofap after 15 years of fapping? My advice: patience. It is what it is. I'd give nofap at least 3 months before i got too hung up (pun!) on the whys and what-to-dos.
