PMO, a honey-trap

Hi friends,

Its something that started at a very innocent age of 10-11. It took a very strong hold of my mind at a tender age. Un-consciously but steadily I developed the habit of M and eventually soft-porn non-penetrating. It went on to become an addiction more powerful than drugs.

As I became a bit conscious I started opposing it with all my might. My mind could never approve it. A fierce battle started between two opposing forces, so intense that it would generate a lot of heat in my mind and made me felt restless. Obsessive thinking followed. I thought and thought without stopping on ways to counter it. I made plans and saw them falling apart one after another. As years progressed the intensity of M went up and up. It eroded my confidence, concentration, self-esteem, positivity and dealt a lethal blow on decision making and analytical thinking. I do simple maths (addition) and check it again and again. Miserable!

It enslaved me..chained me..decimated me..destroyed me..Made me hollow. I feel torn apart, restless, unable to come to truce..it ravaged me again and again and again..feels like sexual exploitation!

Inferiority complex, completely choked and suffocated within. My body doesn't support but my mind is forcing this on me. Always feel mentally tired, at the lowest level of my energy. It's been a phase of severe stress, depression and of late I found that it wasn't just depression it was bi-polar disorder.

Now I feel I'm at the right place with the community standing for me..I feel more secure & comfortable in the company of like minded people. I feel loved here..

Wish you 'strength and peace' in your fight against none but yourself!!

Day1 starts..