Fantasizing is like watching porn?

This depends on what "mode" you've chosen.

If you are in "hard mode," fantasizing probably should not be be entertained in your chosen way of rebooting.

I would ask whether fantasizing about this woman in whom you are obviously interested might be detrimental to your developing relationship.

You might be thinking too much about sex too early in the game.

Naturally, you will be turned on and have sexual feelings for her.

Fantasizing is something different; it's an obsession with one thing--sex.

This is an early stage of your relationship in which it would, in my opinion, be best for you to get to know her as a complete person.

Be curious about everything that she does in her life, and discover her interests.

Since you want to continue dating her, you'll need to imagine places the two of you could go together and fun things you can do there.

If this relationship were meant to be, and if it develops in a healthy way, the sex will happen in its own time.

It need not happen in your mind now.

And, if the relationship is based on a true bond, then the sex will be better than anything you could fantasize now.

 

Fantasizing is porn to the mind - yes! It releases dopamine and slows down your reboot!

 

At times its even worst , for someone like me fantasizing is more hard to control

 

I agree.

Same experience. That's why we do it.

 

One hundred and eighty days is incredible!

You have gone so far that you don't need to count days anymore.

PMO is so much out of your life that you don't even need to think so much about avoiding it.

Note that I've agreed with others' responses to your question.

 

For me to avoid fantasizing is key to feel calm through the day and then to survive the night!

I have some thoughts that help me to block that:
- Im against the tirany of IMAGES (because Im also a musician and Im tired of videos vs music alone i.e.), sexuality goes far beyond what I see
- Imagination where it belongs, to solve problems, to create art, I dont need it in relationships It only create artificial problems and fals scenarios
- What I imagine hides what my desire is truly missing, to deal with emotions I neglect, it is a form of scaping
- Im present, open to what emerges not trying to see If something fits what I´ve imagined
- etc...

Daily training on that for me to go through, my relationship gets more real as the days go by, my will becomes clearer, I dimention much better what I can really do, what I like, what I feel, having my mind full of images clouds my judgement and makes me suffer before I experience something...

AGAINST THE TIRANY OF IMAGES!!!!

 

Yup... Mental porn.....is still porn

It provides a dose of the drug you are addicted to, and your brain will want more

 

I use a technique from Anthony Robbins which instructs you to change the mental memory. I.e. Change the fantasy so that is no longer arousing.

For example....When the object of your fantasy comes to mind, picture her getting sucked out an airplane door, and then falling away and behind you, getting smaller and smaller

Picture your fantasy being like a mental movie… And you are the director. Just change it to anything that is not sexy. It can be scary it can be funny, it can be Tarantino like violence....does not matter. As long as your brain doesn't get to enjoy the feeling of arousal.

After you do this a few times for each fantasy… It becomes the new memory

 

Yes, because it activates the same reward pathways in the brain as watching it (http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/what-about-fantasizing-during-reboot).
Having said that, I don't think it is as bad as watching it, but it is still bad.
We can't control all our thoughts, so sexual thoughts will pop up. I think as long as one doesn't consciously indulges in fantasy and resists these thoughts, they should be fine.

 

This reminds me of how monks will think of death, often in grotesque ways, when they have lustful thoughts.

We might not use such extreme imagery, but the thought of death does bring one back to reality.

Beauty and youth fade, and they end.

The practice @feo1966 suggests is the same, and it has been done for centuries.

It has been proven to work if one is willing.

 

Try, try, try (and be smart about it, too)!

 

@Deadlihood : now your avatar is completely blank lol.
fantasizing is just like watching psubs. Very soon we will seek pmo to get the fulfillment whether by fantasy and real p, or even real sex.
I have an idea, not sure if it is safe or not "is it safe to imagine i am that female pornstar and feel what she feels? is it safe to connect with the trigger when i got triggered?". Sounds kinda deeper "is it safe to merge and feel what devil feels?". "is it necessary to merge and connect with the devil to deal with the devil?" And if i can do that, the devil will change me, or me will change the devil. sounds risky

 

I hate risky! 8)

P.S. Hasn't my avatar always been blank?

 

I'm going to put this into practice from now on. Thanks for this suggestion!

 

@Deadlihood : actually your avatar has been always blank since the beginning lol. also can't access your profile
btw should i try that method do you think?

 

About thinking of grotesque ways to die? Yes! I will be inplementing that moving forward. Thank you, @feo1966 and @DayOne44.

P.S. - How funny; I've never actually seen NoFap on a computer before! I didn't know the layout looks liked that. I've exclusively used NoFap on my iPhone 6 thus far. Ha.