Hey everyone, First, thank you for building a community like this. It is great to see that I'm not the only one who's trying to kick this bad habit and actually takes the time to help each other. I hope that I too can pay it forward someday. I guess I should start with a little bit of my history. I am a 25 year old man who was born and raised in Montreal, Canada. I think that I started masturbating when I was about 13 and I only used my imagination then. During my teen years, I never watched internet porn because at my house, we only had one computer that was in the living room. Although, I did have a TV and a DVD/VHS player in my room. I would always watch regular movies that had nude scenes in it and jerk off to it. I would rent those movies whenever I could and I've even had a personal stash of it. It was movies like ''American Pie'' that I would watch every night. I would even jerk off every morning before I go to school. I remember I even pretended a few that I was sick so I could spend the day to masturbate. I have been my coping mechanism whenever I would be bullied at school or felt bad about myself... It wasn't until I've gotten my own laptop that I started watching internet porn. I was around 17 when I started using it. My habits hadn't changed much because of it. always been between 2-3 times a day. By then, I was still a virgin who never had a girlfriend. I didn't think of it much but I did promise to myself that when I get my first girlfriend, I will stop doing it. By the time I went to college, I've made a lot of new friends but I didn't get any girlfriends. I remember, there was this one girl that I though she would be the love of my life but I ended up heartbroken again... So, I took a trip to Europe for a few weeks to get my mind off of it and I ended up having sex for the first time with a girl I met in Brussels at the hostel I was staying at. When I got back from my summer vacations and started my semester again, I met my first girlfriend. It was exhilarating at first but after a while, it has taken it's tole. We gotten in a relation within a week of meeting each other and after a month, I realized what kind of person she really was; A lonely person who doesn't want to be alone... I think we had sex successfully only 3 times and all the other times, I got PIED. I didn't really understand what the problem was at the time but I do believed that it wasn't just PIED, but also the fact that I didn't want to be with her anymore. Our relationship lasted 5 months and afterwards, it was always awkward when we saw each other and there was a few times that she tried to start a relationship again but I refused. By the final 2 years of college, I discovered NoFap through Gary Wilson's video on youtube. Now I really understood I had become addicted to porn. I have managed to reach 100 days of NoFap. By the end, I felt amazing but after that milestone, I relapsed... I was able to do 200 days of NoFap later but saw the really cool benefits again but I relapsed after... when I finished college... Now, 2 years later.. I have been struggling to quit it for good and get my life on track again so I decided to going this forum! I need support to get through this thing so that's where you guys come in. Thank you for letting me join but I hope for a better tomorrow to everyone! P.S. Sorry for the long post. I needed to get this out of my system.
Don't apologize for telling your story, that's why we're all here. Welcome to the community, 100&200 days of NoFap is impressive. The way I see it, you did 100, then 200, why not now shoot for 300? Then try to continue your success. If you reset, no big deal, the battle you want to win is the one that keeps you out of relapse, that's where we come in. Don't hesitate to jump on here if you get to that point. Good luck, you'll make it this time!
Thanks guys! It really Nice to have some support. I think that I relapsed because those two times because of what was going on in my life and I didn't know how manage it...
