Hi there Im new here, but NoFap is not something new for me, im just dealing with another problem in my life. Have a look at my Story It all started in about 2005 when me and my Friends had lots of LAN-Parties. We exchanged our Music and Videos and of course there was also Porn. It was the first time i came into Contact with Porn. It made me so horny, i couldnt resist it, so i started to masturbate with it. Later in 2007 i had sex for the first time with a hooker. I was bullied at work, because i was 18 years old and never had sex. So i gave it a try. I still have bad Feelings for all the Prostitutes i "fucked" in that year, because they were all from hungary. Theres slavery included by this women sometimes... It felt like i cheated myself and the self hate started to grow Then in 2008 i met my first real girlfriend. I had to marry her so she could stay here, because she was from a non-eu country. That was in 2009. I still occasionally masturbated to porn, but mostly i had sex with her. 2010 was the year that started the hell. First there was trouble with my friends. They couldnt stand that i didnt join them anymore drinking and smoking weed, because i spend all my time with my girlfriend. I said to myself, well you guys aint no real friends so fuck you all. I decided not to see them anymore. And i thought that because i still had my girl beside me, i could find some new friends. But then it all happened. In 2011 we split up. I had to move to another place because of work. When the divorce was over i cried, because i had nobody anymore, no friends, no woman and i was miles away from my family. Things got even worse, because in the place i moved, people from other parts of the country werent welcome. My german people treaded me like some sort of stranger from mars... And because all of that i became a heavy depression. I couldnt perform at work anymore and i had to quit my job. I moved to another place to leave this village, but it didnt work out. I got anxiety attacks at the new job there. Finally i wasnt able anymore to work. I couldnt pay my flat anymore and had to move back to my parents. That was 2013. I got a little bit of work at the end of 2013 but i quit it, because it drained me empty. In 2014 i got very sick. I have been to the hospital about 6 times, only to find out that i had an anxiety disorder and a middle degreed depression. Since i was unable to work i stayed at home waiting for the medication to work. Besides that i used to masturbate a lot to porn. Also i didnt have any sex since the end of 2012, when i had a threesome with a couple ( i freaked out after i orgasmed...). By the end of 2014 i got better and i started a new job in 2015. But it tourned out that i still havent fully recovered and i had to quit the job again. Now i am at home, no job, no friends, no girl...and i am 27 now... All of the people i know in my neighborhood moved out of their parents home and got jobs, but im stuck here. I rejected three girls that were interested in me, because i thought i could never have a normal relationship with them. How in gods name? With my psychic disorders and the PMO stuff... I couldnt look myself in the eyes when i saw myself i a mirror... Well i dont wanna sounds so pityful, ist just overwhelming me. I have so many areas that need work, and i am making progress only in limited amount. Im going to Gym to get rid of my overweight, but socially im doing nothing. I dont feel ready to "connect" with people again. Especially not with my ex-friends... Last time i saw them was in 2014. They were actually very nice to me, but they still drink much and only smoke weed. And i have given up this things for the rest of my life. I cant drink alcohol with my medication, lol my liver is gonna die. ^^ Thank God im not relying on Tranquilizers anymore, but im still unable to work. Everytime when there is some pressure due to time constraints etc im starting to sweat like crazy. And it still isnt over. Now my Psychatrist is sending me to a clinic in about a Month. I have really high hopes for that time, they say i will be able to be resilient again, because thats whats missing atm. In terms of Porn, well i havent watched any of it for about 3 and a half Months now. I masturbated quite some times, sometimes also to porn fantasy but im trying to readjust them. For example i when i mastubated i always saw myself in the 3rd person perspective... not really what i wanted. But it just feels "natural" to me, so i definately have some stuff to reboot. What do you guys thinks? Should i try to masturbate a little less? I dont really think about sex, i dont like myself like i am now, so i think i cant really relax enough to have sex. Thats about it, i appreciate every comment thank you
Hey Mr. Wizard Personally I think you have very high standarts for yourself and I admire this! You had a really bad time behind you, and I'm glad you have found some help and try to go to a clinic! I don't know if you need an P.M.O reboot. In fact you are trying to reboot your life and you have my full respect for the things you've been through and for the next step! I think you should consider if this isn't a bit much reboot for this short amount of time. I think a PMO reboot is great and it can probably change your life. But i don't think it can heal the wounds from your life so far. Do you think so?
Hi RelevantesThema Thanks for writing, i see now that i really must have high standards for myself, i never believed it but many people keep saying this to me lol. Im also not so shure about a PMO reboot. While i havent had any sex for the past 4 years, i can masturbate without porn. But as i wrote, my fantasies are a little influenced by porn, so i thought a reboot would help maybe. But yeah, im trying to reboot my whole life and maybe it is too much at this point. Never thought about this, i expect myself to be capable with all this stuff. And i also think that a Reboot will not help me with the other stuff in my life, since its not related so closely. You certainly got your point. Well im not quite shure what to do now, i just would like to be healthy again, thats all i ask for.
Hey Mr. Wizard, I wanna encourage you. I feel like I'm in the same mental space. I'm full of guilt and lonliness all the time. I've never had a "true" girlfriend, but I've hooked up over the years. From a biological perspective, when we masturbate too much, it creates an overproduction of dopamine and we feel tired and worthless and lethargic. Rebooting will help you respond and recognize natural rewards. Hang in there man. You can do this and you'll see improvements
Hi WokeUp88 Thanks for the encouragement. Dont worry, a girlfriend for you will come along somewhen. To me it happened always when i was the least prepared for it. Or better said she will come when you dont expect it. Just let go of the thougt and carry on, then it will happen naturally. So you had sex with hookers? Well i had my first sex with one... i just had to wait one year and i would have gotten a girlfriend but... i did it. How are you doing with no PMO? I am minimizing my masturbation to once a week to see if i improve. Im not gonna cut it totally, im not shure about that. It seems natural to me to "let go" sometimes. And i havent looked at any porn for about 100 days.
Hey wizard, No I've never had sex with a hooker. I've only had sex during hook-ups or girl I was dating. Today I wanna quit making excuses. If I want a full reboot, I think I need to quit smoking pot too. I feel numb and I know weed is not helping. I used to love to PMO and smoke pot, but that's the worst "hang over" ever. I feel completely foggy and lazy. So, I feel like I can control the PMO. I feel less in control of smoking and I know its preventing my brain from fully healing. So I'm trying to take responsibility for my own emotions. This is Day 2 for me. I haven't PMO since Sunday and dont really have the urge to. My sex drive feels low right now and its because I've been abusing my brain with dopamine (pot + PMO). 100 days is amazing man. How do you feel?
Hey wizard! I'm writing this in order to inform you that you're not alone, I feel the same way you do. Less friends, nobody to hangout with at school, no girlfriend for years (I always thought that not having a girlfriend was my choice, but its really not) , pmo "FUCKED ME UP" mentally, physically, spiritually ... The key is not to focus on not pmo'ing its focusing on being the best version you can be. I hope this helped you, stay strong my friend
Hi WokeUp88 I know the Pot/PMO-Thing too well. I used to smoke pot for many years in conjunction with pmo. But i stopped 2 years ago completly because of my disorders. My psychatrist even said that it may be responsible for creating my anxiety and depression disorder (In the beginning i went to three different psychiatrist to get as many different views as possible for my disorders. And everyone told something different. The first said "its pot!", the second and third said it was my life that screwed me up. So one cannot really tell if it was pot for shure. But the possibility is definately there). So if i can give you one advice it would be stop smoking pot immediately. It is known that weed can cause this disorders for quite some time now and i wish it to nobody! Its not worth it. Well for the 100 days i can say that i occasionally feel the urge to look at porn, especially the videos i liked most. But im not going to relapse, im not letting that happen. I commited myself to this and it will stay this way. However, of course i had previous attempts where i went clean for a month or two and then suddenly gave in and watched porn again. This time is over. So far i feel definately better. I always felt so low after watching porn, that was unbearable. So i put an end to this. But i used to watch porn for about 10 years so i dont expect it for all to leave in just 3 months. I think it will take some time until all this porn fantasies go away. I also stopped smoking a year ago and still have cravings. But i cant expect no urges after smoking for 10 years either. It will help you for shure to let go of both habits that you have. It will make you feel better. Just keep going. I wish you a successful journey with no pot/pmo. Hi there NewYearNewMe Thanks for staying with me, glad to know I feel with you, having no friends is an uncomfortable situation, but well i have other troubles that need some more attention at the moment. Yes Pmo is evil and i think nobody should suffer from this thing. Its crazy that this is all avaibable for free and in two clicks... Focusing on my life and not pmo is exactly the thing im doing right now, took some time to learn this but it was well worth the wait. Somewhen a nice girl will cross your way and youll be happy with her forever Wish you all the best and thanks
Hi Guys So i am back, havent been here for quite some time... and some stuff happend as well. I was in a psychatric clinic for 7 weeks. I did a lot of sport there and my endurance went up quite a bit, actually about a third. Im keeping the sport routine and im doing jogging 6 times a week and 3 times weight training. I hope im going to lose my overweight and finally feel better about myself again. Right now i still cant look in a mirror and see myself... but i think its coming along and im going to get fit again, it just takes some time as im 10 kg overweight atm. In the clinic i had 2 therapy sessions per week, but they didnt help me at all. My anxiety is still strong. And about anxiety. I tried 2 new medications, but none of them has worked for me. By now i tried about 10 different medications. Only one is working for me and that one is still not strong enough to cure me. My Psychiatrist told me that im actually "uncureable"... If im not responding to the mediactions, theres nothing i can do and i have to live with it, probably for the rest of my life. When she said that it felt like i died inside. I couldnt stand the thought and i was getting nervous like crazy. So crazy that i went to a store and bought cigarettes to calm me. Now im smoking again after i stopped it for a year. However im feeling calmer now and i decided to stop it again when im in better shape. So i thought about changing my doctor and going to another, just to hear a different view but im afraid to pick up the phone and call someone, because im afraid that they will tell me the same. I dont know what to do about this. i also tried to work again, but im still getting nervous like crazy and im starting to sweat. I sweat so much that my t shirt is completly wet. Im not shure if this anxiety will ever leave me alone, so far it wont go away that easy. I tried working with self help books, but they couldnt help me that much. If anyone knows a good book about anxiety disorders, please let me know, thanks. What i also did was buying a book about meditation and im doing excercises for a week now. I can calm myself somewhat, but my mind is still racing sometimes. However, i read that it takes about 8 weeks for meditation to take effect on the brain, so i got 7 more weeks to go and then see if it helped me. I hope this is gonna work out, since i cant rely on medications. What im also doing is preparing a portfolio to apply for an internship. Im working on it almost everyday and its at least something i like to do. Unfortunately im competting against other guys who also want that internship, so im a little stressed because i have to be quite good at it. But im trying to give my best. Sometimes my depression shows through and gives me thoughts like "youre not worth anything, just leave it it, meakes no sense" etc. Im not feeling my depression that hard anymore, but the thoughts are still there. This also came out in the clinic, where i had to take tests. It came out that i feel much better than im really doing^^ and that makes me lose trust in myself, because its mostly an illusion that i feel better. For the Porn thing...i havent watched any videos for 7 months now. I do started to look at pictures however and i masturbated quite some times. Not in front of the computer but later in the bed. I had times where i stopped masturbating and waited until the "natural desire" for it came. Im gonna do that again, as i dont want to masturbate just to calm me and that ive done it. I want it to be something special. So ive got some plans and im trying my best to follow and reach them. I hope you guys do well and i whis you much strength in this situations. Cheers
I could relate all too well with your 1st post. About your second post, you suffer from anxiety disorder? You sweat? What's the problem with sweating? You said that you're fat after all, fat people sweat more that's a fact. You said you applied for internship. At hospital? Clinical recover for addicts? University? Monastery? Please specify. Sorry for my dry style we are all here to improve our lives but you fucked with yours didn't you? The damage that is done, is done, nothing can be done, or maybe can? All you can do now is think of future. Your doctor says you are incurable then you go and buy a pack of cigarettes. How will this help? I fucked my life as hard as you fucked yours, but... maybe others can see clearer the facts one can't see about himself. I think you should stop smoking pot, or cigarettes. I think you should do a full, hard mode reboot. If you hate yourself fapping will make you hate even more. Now, if you have problems with your image, being fat, should do exercises and eat healthy things too. Personally, I think fat is OK. Even for girls. Take only the medication you need, or the one who works better. You are young you don't need this crap. You are not going to die if you stop, but consider this well, and go to a doctor once again if you want to stop taking medicine (I think you should). Only basic life advice, don't do drugs, don't hurt yourself. Keep going one day after another you'll be fine.
Hi guys @itornael Thanks for your time. How could you relate to my first post? What did you do as i did? Im really interested. Yes i suffer from an anxiety disorder, actually from a "generalized anxiety disorder" and a "middle-degreed depression". Thats the official diagnosis from all the doctors i visited, and that were about 4 different ones. Well the problem with the sweating is that it makes me look very strange. When i was still working last year as an electrician i had to do quite some hard work. Then slowly my t-shirt began to get wet and after half an hour it was completly wet. My coworkers looked strange at me and started to ask if im doing good etc. And that happened almost every day. I had to change cloths every time before we made a break in the restaurant. The sweating also started when i did work that wasnt really hard or difficult, it was just the mere fact that i had work to do and finish in time. So definately theres something wrong with my mindset. I tried to change that with self-help books, but ive havent gotten very far. Maybe i didnt tried hard enough, i dont know. Thats why im looking for another psychiatrist who does cognitive therapy instead of medication, since i tried everything in that regard. Now im applying for an internship as a 3D-Artist. Theres some companies in my country where they offer internships and i wanna try that. I had to stop working as an electrician because of my disorders and i dont think i can go back. Besides i also worked in an office for 2 years and it felt great, so im trying to get an office job once again, thats my goal in terms of work. Also 3D is my main Hobby and i like it very much, and the thought of earning money with it and being able to live from that is very pleasing. Im not shure if there can be any damage reversed, i try to look ahead and not back, but my past is sometimes haunting me, especially with all the women i came in touch. I could have had some girls which wanted me but i was so sick that i thought i couldnt handle a relationship and they would leave me soon. Basically i was afraid of them...and i turned down their offers. I know regret isnt something good but its hard to let go of this thoughts. As you can see i have quite a few problems with my mindset, which needs work asap, but im looking into that. LOL, yes buying cigarettes isnt gonna help, i was just overwhelmed with what she said. I got completely nervous, because i always thought that its possible to cure me, if i only found the right medication. But now that i know that this isnt possible, because i tried all of the different anxiety-medications, it just fucked me up big time. However im planning to give it up one more time, but in the future when im back into work and more stable than now. In terms of pot, i havent smoked any since 2.5 years and im never gonna do that again, thats done and im over it, thankfully. For the fapping, well i didnt fap to any videos for 7 months now, i only started to look at pictures and then masturbate in bed with fantasy of them. I stopped doing that and im not going back. I still have lots of memories of porn in my head and it started to slowly drift away, but then i started looking at pictures and the memories came back. But i think here im on a good way, looking at porn isnt gonna happen anymore, and i dont miss it at all. Im not 100 % cured of it, but about 40 % id say. Still gonna take some time, especially the memories of my favourite movies... And i havent had sex in 4 years now, i will try that out as soon as im able to, but not now, i dont feel like it. Im excercising much more than 2 months before now, im really doing it and im eating healthy as good as i can, but it just takes some time. In a month i can see if it worked out, now i only have one week behind me, so 3 more to go. Better slow but sustainable than fast and unhealthy. Why should i stop taking medication? So far it has helped me quite a bit, just not enough. The problem is that i MAY had a psychotic episode and for that you need medication, theres no way around it. As soon as im stable and back working again etc, i can get rid of it. Id rather take some time now and be shure everything works out, than leaving it and suffer again. Im aware that psychopharmaka is controversial and may not help at all. But i was totally destroyed when the anxiety disorder started, i couldnt think normal, i had pains everywhere in my body, i couldnt drive a car, my heart was racing all the time, my blood pressure was up and i got a tinnitus as well. This is all gone, probably thanks to the medication. Thats why i think it helped me and im continuing taking it for some time now. Thank for your advice Cheers
First... I gave you some bad advice up there. I didn't know. Probably you should keep on medication if you'll have attacks otherwise. I didn't go much far with pot, alcohol and mostly I think my friends at high school dragged me to a life like that. I never thought that quit masturbating was hard. I thought it was impossible. I dropped off church because of that, and sometimes I slept on the streets. I remember that I scared people but I couldn't even get up after so many bottles with my so called "friends". Had a girlfriend, she left me, and a few days after this, my parents had me move from the city. Been lonely since that. I'm almost 30 years old and looking back I did nothing about my life. If I had any goals, I let them aside, which is a big regret for me. I just feel bad for not having a job and living with my parents. Only this is enough to give me stress and anxiety, but not to a clinical degree like yours. I'm really hoping after this reboot I'll feel better. And I wish you get cured if not of all the problems, at least some. I sincerely believe we invited depression into our lives by neglecting our feelings in name of pleasure and the feel of being drained, or devoid of life, is much due to fapping and just forgetting and entering in a world of fantasy. I hope I made myself clear enough this time. Best wishes and good luck
hey itornael i think you will definately feel better after the reboot. Porn can drain you, as you said, and do many other bad things. But i can ashure you that its more than worth it. I was struggling in the beginning but it worked out. Not for a 100 % as by now but for some degree. And i can keep this thing "out of my house" and im not bothered by it anymore. Its like a big stone dropped of my heart. I always knew that porn cant be good but i had to read it until i believed it. From that moment i took care and got rid of it. I wish you the strength to do just that. As for living with your parents, i know it sucks and you feel bad. I also still live at home, but im trying my best to get my own life back and be able to live on myself. I feel out of place under other people at my age because they all live by themself now but i dont...but at least im trying, i just have a difficult time in my life now, thats my "excuse" and most people understand it. What do you do for a job? You gotta find something that you can do to live by yourself, what are your intents? Wish you all the best Cheers
Hi Wizard After reading your story and the above replies. I think all of your problem were caused from masturbation, it drained your body, impaired the functionof your organs and glands. We have to know, sperm are very precious it contains protein in a much more complicated folding, imagine it contains codes for a baby, a glass of milk can never let you recover from your loss. All of your symptoms may be reduced once you quit masturbation, I know it is hard, but you have already quitted porn, aren't you? So it is aleady a great success, cheers. Now you have to think this way, do you really want to quit masturbation, if yes, continue reading. If no, are you satisfield with masturbation with the fantasy in your head once in a while? But it causes you to lose both mental and physical health. Masturbating is like a sweet poison, a drug. It gives you a short period of pleasure but endless pain and symptoms to come. The following are some tips I replied to other post yesterday, but I think it may be helpful to you, so I copied and made some modification to suit your situation. There are some tips that I found useful to quit masturbation. 1. Destroy all the DVD, delete all the porn files, including those pictures from your personal computer and never have them again. As you mentioned looking the pictures also remind you the scenery of porn, which make you very aroused and then masturbate, so these pictures actually are bad for you, because they eventually make you masturbate. 2. Do not get controlled by your libido, "libido“ itself is not a "real you", it is just hormone, because you are a man with testicles, they secreted hormone, but imagine you only have a soul without your body, your soul with not infulenced by hormones. Do not let your desire overpower you, the real you is your soul. Testicles are a part of your body but you can control it, not let it become your master. 3. You must realised libido is acutally a form of energy, it comes periodically, you can transform this energy through breathing exercise, it is practiced among some martial artists, yoga practitioners, and monks in Asia. They are not married and they consistently practice to use this energy for longevity, healthiness, martial art skills, intellectual development, and internal peace. Generally, when you feel your libido is aroused. Stop it and focus on the botton tip of your spine, where the coccygeal vertebra is, lifting up yourr anus, then imagine a golden light transport from your lower abdomen to the vertebra while gradually breathing in, then hold your breath the light gradually travel up through your spine, when you can't breath in anymore, the light should be at the very tip of your skull, then slowly breathing out, the light goes into center of your body and spread out to nourishing entire body. This exercise should be doen with repetition, until you feels desire went away, you should be able to stop the desire(I may not explain it clealy enough, but you can always search for more, e.g how to transform sexual energy into other forms of positive energy) 4. One extreme way and usually the most effective way to quite porn is practice looking girls with imagination, imagine they are a moving toilet, their body contains blood, instesines, lungs, heart, fat, shits, urine just like we do. Why do you feel aroused toward a moving toilet? Get an anatomy book it will help you to imagine the organs. The last and most powerful one, is to imagine the porn actress or your fantasy girls was dead, their body corrupting and rotting, swelling, worms come out over couples of weeks, eventually only skeleton left. (You can google search for dead body or skeleton, but not recommend after lunch or dinner.) It is the most powerful practice among the ancient monks. Just like an old saying"beauty is only skin deep" and it is quite true, isn't it?, imagine skin layer become a plastic layer,therefore a plastic bag containes organs, blood, shits, urine, will you like to watch it and masturbate? (this practice is not meant to insult any female or make you to become a freak, it is effective if you really want to win the battle, use it especially on the last minute before you decide to watch porn or masturbate.) 5. Have a new habbit, go outdoor, surround yourself with nature, tree and sunlights, play sports, listen to music, be cautious in a lonely night. Nature has a postive field that able to make a postive influence on you. I hope you found the above tips helpful. Quiting masturbation seems to be the only way out. It will not affect on your sexual function at all. Most importantly, stop looking and fall your imagination, stop thinking immediately once you aware it is happening. Everytime the desire come up, practice the breathing exercise. It works. with best wishes.
Hi Guys @ Amai I deleted all the porn stuff i had a loing time ago, but theres still google... But yeah im gonna stop looking at this pics! Thanks for your help. I never really thought about quitting masturbation to be honest. Im using it to escape from some of the symptoms i have, i admit. Actually im gonna try quitting it for a month and look what it does with me. So far i have 2 days without it. However i never noticed any improvements when not masturbating. Before all of this happened i also had some weeks of no masturbation and i didnt notice any difference. Maybe this time i will? I dont know. Since i masturbate almost daily, it has become a habit of me and i dont think it will be that easy to quit it. Thats why i never thought about it... But yes im gonna give it a try. Quitting porn was the easy part, at least for me, but giving up masturbation is hard, i know that for shure. Do you have any scientific proof for your "theory"? Because i read all the books about quitting porn including the one from gary wilson (rebootnation.org). It is never mentioned that masturbation drains you or sucks out your energy. It a split of people from 2 different sides, some telling this and some telling that. Actually the same as with pyschopharmaka. There are a lot of people who think that this isnt right and doesnt work at all, while my doctor believes in it being the right way. Same goes for getting psychic disorders from smoking pot. There is no real evidence that its absolutely true. Im a little sceptical... But anyways, im gonna try your suggestion and see what happens. I think one month should be enough to see an effect. Thanks for your time Cheers.
Hi Wizard, Thank you for your reply, I am glad that you are willing to take some of my suggestions, these are my own experience, I found they works effectively againsting my lust. Including the breathing exercise I mentioned to you, it helps me to shift my libido into a form of warm feeling inside my body. To make it simple for you, just " lifting up your anus, then imagine some sort of energy is dragged from groin area into vertebra while gradually breathing in, when you cannot breathing anymore, focus your will on tip of the skull then breath out, focus inside your body to get the gentle warmth" it helps a lot to me, but I do not know if it works to you. If it does not help, regardless, you can take my other suggestions in the previous post. You asked me for scientific proof, the answer is I do not have one. This concept was from Oriental medicine, in the their fundamental theory kidney essence governs growth and reproduction, one must preverse it for longevity, kidney also opens its orifice at Ear, responsible for bone growth, lower back and knees, the essese of organs reflect on the eyes. Whether this theory is true, unfortunately, scientists can not design a experimental framework to test it yet (cannot see it on celluar signal transduction or chemical compound based result yet), but it can be proofed indirectly through how the patient feels. Normally, patients who addicted to masturbation may have weakness in intellegence, loss focus, stubborn acnes, serious loss hair, bad looking, weakness in knees and lowerback. And practice Yoga and Taichi can help to reduce anxiety calm your mind, reduce blood pressure and restore functions of your body become more energitic and gain mental clearity. If I am not mistaken, did you say you wanna masturbate to escape some of your symptom, may I ask which symptoms you are trying to escape? but I am also glad that you are willing to give it a try to quit it for a month and see the difference. I am sure it is the right way to do it, you are on the right direction, but I can not guaranteed that other symptoms can be reliefed like a miracle in this one month, because you have already masturbate regularly as a habit for many years, to recover in one month seems not easy, you have to give yourself more time, be patient, because it is normally a life long battle requre self-control. Quitting masturbation, may sounds hard to you or you still have a concept from urologist saying "masturbation is healthy, you can do it ocassionally to release it out, otherwise you may get prostatitis, semen are just normal proteins, masturbation does not drains your energy". It is the serious mistake and most irresponsible advise from a medical doctor that misguided hundreds of thoushand men in the modern days. (Also, if you do not get sick, how does the hospital earn?) There are a lot things that science can not yet proof, medical research is progressing slow, cancer has been studied for decades still found no cure for it, so does AIDS,alzheimer disease etc. In Oriental medicine, the danger of masturbation is well documented, most of the victoms share the same symptoms, they are reliable clinical datas with large patient numbers. Most of us suffer from the symptoms after masturbation and do not know why, because researches did not documented this. We simply loss too much nutrients after masturbation. Symptoms only comes after your 30s. Our somatic cells only have limited replication so does the germ cells, used up to many semen while your were young may cause serious troube when you get older. Quitting masturbation is to cultivate your masculine energy, and you can apply this and gain success in other aspect of your life. You will stay more charged, more engaged with life, become a natural self, you can talk to female with a purity mind, and become more confident. If you still have problem after quitting masturbation, is either the recovery time is not enough, or maybe you also have other problems that not directly to do with your sexual habbits. We know it is very very hard to quit masturbation, but everybody here wants to have a better life and be a better man. I hope you found my answers helpful. Cheers
Hey man I just red ur post. Thought I'd share my thoughts... I've been doing the nofap thing officially for the last 15days.... Before that, I heard of it thru a friend and challenged myself to see how many days I can go without fapping. The first time I hit 50days and the second time I hit 30days. What I'm really trying to say is I have experience with nofap and I'd like to share my thoughts on why u should do it irrespective of whats going on in your life.. Nofap isn't just about abstaining from masturbating or porn... It's about being able to control ur mind.... Being able to give urself a direction, unlike ur mind taking over and u giving into ur emotions.... I read about all the shit u went thru.... But whats really getting to u isn't that. It's the fact that u constantly think about it. If u could control ur thoughts, u could remove all that junk and focus on ur present to make ur future better. In order to be able to do this u need mental discipline. Your mind needs to be strong enough to stay in the moment so that u can figure out how to lead a better life instead of thinking about all the things that have happened to u. And I think the best tool u have in front of u is to not masturbate when I get the urge to, irrespective of whether it's porn induced or not. Ud basically go through a journey where ull kesnr to take control of urself... And when u learn to master urself.... Ull realise u are in charge of ur destiny.... Sounds zenish but it's true.... So don't think of the nofap challenge and a way to stop it porn or as something u do only if ure an addict... It's more about self control.... Dealing with a very natural urge and abstaining from it.... If Uve read the nofap posts in the website ull realise that all their excericises like meditation and cold showers are way for unto take control of ur mind by putting urself in an uncomfortable spot and forcing ur mind to bow to u instead of the other way round..... And remember it isn't going to happen quickly. It could take years... Having said that don't keep ur targets low... Set a high bar and challenge urself to accomplish it.... I'm sure it'll all make more sense when u accomplish this one challenge for 90days... Just start with this... Forget everything else... Start with this one thing and commit to only this one thing. Watch how ur life changes around u slowly.
Hi Guys @Amai @Cuddywater By escaping from symptoms i meant something else, i wasnt clear enough. I meant that i use masturbation as an esacpe from, for example when a girl rejects my smile or something else bad happens to me. Im running in my fantasy to escape reality. However i dont do this always on purpose. Sometimes i have a natural urge to let go, when i saw hot looking girls during the day or had interaction with one of them. This is already enough for me to have a reason to masturbate. But im gonna try to not masturbate for a month and see what happens. If its not enough i may go with another month. Well im saying this so easy but i know its gonna be hard... Im just having trouble with the fact that masturbation is something so "bad" for you guys. What if i had 2-5 times sex a week? I would also release my sperm many times there . I was in a relationship for 2 years where i had this and i never ever felt tired. I cant remember any tiredness, no matter how many sex i had. Honestly i think that when the desire for masturbation comes, its okay to do it. For example when i didnt masturbate frequently, and i did that many times, it took 2-3 weeks and then the urge was crazy. I would get boners in the bus while looking at beautiful girls. For me this is just natural and nothing bad. Thats how our body is supposed to work, getting as many females pregnant as possible. Its just natural. I feel very uncomfortable to go against my own instincts. But i can see that the daily masturbation that i practice atm is not something good. I agree with this. And i also want to see what happens when i stop it. So ill give it a try. It just doesnt feel right. I always thought that my tiredness came from my psychic disorders, which are known to make tired and not being able to have that much energy. Im teared apart here, one the one side i can understand you guys, but on the other...i dont know, it just seems wrong to me. But well im open to anything that helps me getting better so im gonna try it. About mind control, im getting into meditation and so far im able to do it for 15 min per day. Im gonna increase the time to half an hour next week. That will be my 3 third week with meditation then. So far it feels good. Sometimes its easy to let go, other times my mind races around like crazy and always drifts away from the breath. But i know this will take some more weeks until i really feel something. Im also doing lots of sports for stress realease and it has really helped me with my sleeping troubles. Before i couldnt fall asleep very well, i lied in bed for more than an hour. Now i fall asleep very fast and i also sleep trough the whole night. Since my teenage years that hasnt happended very often, i can count that from my two hands. So heres an improvement that i feel after 1.5 weeks of 30 min sports a 6 days a week. Im very happy about that . And yes id very much like to be able to control myself and my destiny and i think im on a good way. What do thin guys? So thanks for your time cheers
Hi Wizard I am glad that you are willing to do an experiment, quit masturbation for one or two months and see what is the difference. For using masturbation as a escape from the difficulties of your life, if I was you, I think it will cause a vicious cycle. "If a man failed respect to a woman, that is one of things cause to examine yourself." If a girl reject my smile, I would think how to make myself attractive, be humourous, prepare some fun things to talk about, praise her in a fair manner, or simply dress cool stylish, have my hairstyle set, go to gym to get my muscle toned, jogging to lose fat. I have to have skills to engage attentions from ladies, and charateristics to get along wiht them make them attracted and stay with me. Here I recommed a book to you, it teaches you mindset and skills about how to pursuit women. "The game" by Neil Strauss. But after all, you have to be a high quality man to be a good partner, husband and father. Using tricks or skills to court women is just a method but not right. By saying a vicious cycle I mean, if I masturbate, I felt my urge relieved but at the same time I lost my determination and will power to pursuit a nice lady in my league. And the foundamental problem is I just lost so much from maturbation, it leads me to lose a lot of nitrients that could supports my brain and body development. Having sceney from porn in my brain while talking to female makes me feel so low and uncomfortable. We are here in NoFap forum, want to be a better man,to cultivate more masculine energy to be more actively engage and scucees in life. So we against masturbation. We know the pleasure is only temporally, but pains in the future. See if you can challenge yourself for no fapping for 90 days, and see the differences and changes. It is the right direction. One thing concerns me is, you said after quitting mastrubation for a while you have raging boner while looking at hot girls on bus, maybe try not to look at them, simply look away, practice the breathing exercise I mentioned in the previous post, or practice the skills about imagine the skin of beauty is only few centimeters deep, organs, blood, fat, urine, intesines, bones are inside their body just like we do, and it is true, the fact of beauty is only skin deep. It helps you to fight with your natural instincts. See if it helps to quench your desire. I had the same experience with you on bus, when this urge happened I understand I am a healthy man full of masculine energy and I used the breathing exercise to transform this impulsive feeling to nourishing my body, and the imagination skills, it helps. I felt awesome after I realised I can aganist my natural instincts, my hormones. Try not to recall the hot girls you saw or interacted with during your day before sleep, it makes you want to have the sexual imagination again. Until one day, you may feel awesome about finding yourself being able to exchange natural look and smile with females, be attracted by and attravctive to female but not in a sexual or umcomfortable way. You mentioned you think it is ok to follow and "let it go", I think to some extend you are right. If you really can't stand it anymore and quitting it makes you feel crazy and have thought to hurt others, to rape, or do anything to violate law, maybe masturbation helps you and you should do it. I want to emphasis everything starts from how you think, if you understand it is just your hormone and you are willing to control your desire, be more discipline, these skills will help you in other perspects of lives too, such as work and relationship. If you have few months not masturbation, our natural process of elimination-nocturnal emission with help you. But it just feels very different to masturbation. You will feel yourself in a status full of masculine energy, better mind, and energitic. It is great to see you have a postive progress and feeling better about your mind and body and I hope you find my opinions constructive and helpful.
Hi Guys @Amai I hope im getting all the good things youre talking about Im gonna start on next Monday and go Month for Month from there. Lets see how far i get... Getting more energy sounds very good but im also realistic and it may will not happen during the first month, maybe i need more time than that. And if its really messing with me, well then i masturbate once, coming down to one, two times a month from daily masturbation is a good progress. Im very excited to feel something good, especially more energy and less depresssion and anxiety. Well i wish you all the best, see you soon and thanks for your tips, they definately help me. Thanks buddy Cheers
