At the risk of sounding a bit cheesy, I would like to extend my appreciation to the nofap members. Over the last week I have been reading many posts, accounts and replies. The level of English here is very good, also grammar is great. The ideas are coherent and make sense. People are very supportive and empathetic, as well as insightful. I've read many lines that can pass for words of wisdom and philosophical ratiocination. People jump in with remarks and tips, irrespective of age, gender or sexual orientation. is it just me or does becoming aware of one's own flaws require a certain IQ and self-education?
You're probably onto something mate. I've noticed something similar. I think it comes with the nature of what is going on here. It's a very focused and goal orientated place. It would be out of place to have sloppy posts and comments here. Everyone is giving their best effort. Being self aware is definitely a form of intelligence.
I would assume that people who fap to porn are rational, good human beings who just never developed their game at approaching women or men. These are people who could have become neurosurgeons, engineers, high-ranking political figures, had they developed the prerequisite confidence. But society does not reward those who are quiet and well-mannered. They love brash, go-getting people who are often quite dumb. What we NoFappers have is the perspective and intelligence of a loner, but the drive and motivation of an idiot deemed successful by society.
The fact is we are very different from the vast majority of people. It amazes me how many people just dont try. They just give up. We choose to be better. We choose to be great.
Without wanting to sound too dismissive, no, I disagree. You also get a lot of people on here to seem incapable of applying their own judgement or common sense to a problem and look to deal in absolutes and have somebody else spoon feed the answer. I would imagine there is a good spread of intelligence on here. May be a slight bias in those that have exposure to the site are likely the types to post on forums or read the internet alot - and so probably have experience on these type of message boards.
Thanks for the feedback guys. Maybe I got a bit carried away. I have felt a strong sense of solidarity and understanding around here, which is only natural as we all fight a common enemy. It is indeed a place where you receive and give something back, trying to pass on some useful knowledge to the others. Acknowledgement of one's own problems is a form of intelligence in itself, as you said, and those who log in here have lived up to the task. I used to be an English teacher and I know good written grammar when I see it. Which also points to some degree of education. Your very comments have also proved my points. I have received six outlooks on the same issue, each carrying a meaningful message. As far as spoon-feeding answers is concerned, I would say many of those people have lost confidence in their own judgement after many relapses and look up to a higher authority for a better approach.... or maybe I'm being too optimistic...
Hi Anon, Our paths have already crossed a couple times. I bet you won't see your neighbor join a no drug community any time soon. As you said he hasn't reached that level of self-awareness and there is no knowing if he ever will. My point is that people who join NoFap community have already undergone a screening process. If they weren't mature and motivated enough, they wouldn't be here in the first place. Those who log in here care either about their own future or the lives of the people around them. Either you empathize with you wife or you project yourself into the future and see what your fap life may look like....we all use more braincells than your neighbor. anyway, the force has taught you well, Obi Wan )
Don't worry, Anon. Rest assured I'll wreak havoc throughout the land ) Addicts will flee for their lives but I will hunt them down and bring them back on the path of righteousness. I just hope I will stay clean for the 90-day period I have set for myself. I am on my 3rd day and staying strong.
If you're English teacher, it may simply be an indictment of our academic standards. Some of it may be explained by the rise of technology (namely, shorthand abbreviation LOL) But it seems every industrialized society (particularly in the West) ostracizes the nerd and glorifies the moron. I'm sure very few people have heard of Michael Faraday or James C. Maxwell, the fathers of electromagnetic physics (as well as the inspirations of Albert Einstein) But mention Steve Jobs and you'll get a response like: "Oh! Isn't he that nerd that invented Apple or something?"
Keep your shirt on, Progressive Death! I used to be an English teacher.... I only forgot to mention that I am not a native speaker. So there is still hope for American academic standards and the world is not so badly designed )
Yes. But those Apple iPhones that you're holding...all three men are to some extent responsible for their existence. My point is, most people will only recognize Jobs (because they're ignorant). We NoFappers go against the grain. We value our beliefs and our futures too much to be controlled by sex. And that defies conventional wisdom. And to OP, being fluent in English and using strange, foreign things like commas and capital letters doesn't automatically give you a high IQ. It may simply mean you care about being perceived as intelligent. MIT kids probably don't know the difference between a preposition and a participle. But are they dumb? No. They're math kids that speak the language of html who may simply not have time or patience to double-check trivial things like spelling.
It's interesting that everyone approached this from the angle of being self-aware, and thus ending up on this forum. I interpreted OP's question to be whether or not it's more likely that those with high intelligence are more susceptible to the PMO addiction. Of course I can only speak from my own experience, but when I was growing up one of the main factors in this development was that of the practical aspect. Simply put, because I was smart and got my homework done quickly, I had time to PMO without my parents or teachers becoming concerned. On a much deeper level, I think more intelligent people have an ability to manipulate themselves into believing something is okay. We can see far more alternate pathways which can provide us with the justification we need to succumb to the urges. Whereas most people might immediately dismiss the idea of masturbating three or four times a day, we would analyse it, and ultimately find a reason that allows us to satisfy the cravings that we all feel. So yeah, I reckon in terms of both the practicality of being able to live a 'double life', and perhaps more relevantly the root causes of the addiction, I reckon there's a link
It seems there is a lot of pent-up dissatisfaction welling up inside you! Using commas/punctuation marks and correct grammar doesn't make you intelligent, but it makes you educated. You seem to put a high value on logical-mathematical intelligence. How about the other 8 types of intelligence such as linguistic intelligence or emotional intelligence? Or are they all just people who just "care about being perceived as intelligent?"
There's a difference between SOUNDING smart and actually BEING smart, my friend. You can use all the fancy terminology you want. But if you're an educator who can't explain a concept to the masses (much like a politician speaking to his constituency in real-world terms) it's all for naught.
I meant this forum to be more of a survey, I never meant it as a place for IQ rating. Since I've seen many interesting ideas, great tips, good grammar and even cultural references, it occurred to me there might be a link between PMO and intelligence and education. The same way autistic people seem to be great with figures, I thought of PMO addiction and awareness to be the result of background, suppression, insight, analysis of one's own current state and final acknowledgement of the problem.
Haven't read through the whole thread - just thought I would add to this. There is a certain subsection of this forum that seem to be here with the motivation that quitting PMO will 'help them get laid' almost an extension of the whole pickup artist culture. I'd argue these people haven't been through the screening process you mention above!
