Inception

Hi! A couple of years ago I did 8 months of NoFap, but I didn't realize back then that what I now know as "edging" was incompatible with my goals. I'm currently on a new streak. But I wanted to tell you how my previous streak and the first one after I heard about NoFap ended.

It lasted about 7 weeks; no P, M, MO or PMO, but occasional sex. Coincidentally in that period my gf's libido was at a low point. We've both had it before and that usually lasts a month or 2-3. Additionally we didn't see each other as much as usual. We don't generally see a problem with trying to get the uninterested one excited for sex, so that's often what I did when we saw each other.

However, at the end of my streak, I got the complaint I was a bit too virile and coming on strong. Even though I never forced anything, she felt obligated to go along with me at times. That's when I said it had been "a while" since I masturbated. She suggested I should, "to relieve the pressure on both of us." I didn't want to follow her suggestion, but said I'd think about it. However, even as I said it, I knew the thought had been planted in my head (see title of post). I relapsed hard and spent a week in an unproductive haze. I don't want to elaborate too much to my gf why I'm doing this, but I did tell her euphemistically that it hadn't helped me much.

The reason I post this here is to get some input on how I might avoid such a situation in the future and to hear about similar experiences. Thanks!

 

I suck at usernames . When I relapsed I went to omegle (for the first time) with the worst of intentions. I ended up having the greatest chats, but since my initial mindset was always frighteningly creepy I wanted to say no to omegle and that specific consequence of a dopamine-adled brain. I've gone there since but now with an entirely different outlook!

 

Yeah, it's not a very unsurmountable problem and she's the greatest. I did think it was curious that one of the putative superpowers (cf. the regular "I locked eyes with this guy/girl in the elevator and there was so much sexual tension!" posts) ended up being perceived so negatively by an external person. Perhaps ... with great power comes ... ? It might be something to keep in mind: to regulate your new-found confidence, etc.

The second thing this illustrates is the effect an external vocalisation of your own addictive thoughts ("just one more time") can have. This is the exact same way my 8-month streak ended. I can't remember what my goal was; I think as long as possible. On my birthday, a friend jokingly suggested "have fun masturbating". I didn't last a day after that. So for me, this kind of "suggestion" is an incredibly powerful trigger! I wonder if that's the same for anyone else...