So you've decided that this time is going to be the last time..... When you complete that final fix of PMO, do so not with a feeling of 'I must never PMO again' or 'I'm not allowed to PMO again' but with the feeling, 'Isn't this great! I'm free! I'm no longer a slave to PMO, I don't ever have to indulge this filthy habit again'. Don't wait for a moment of revelation, it won't come.... don't spend your time thinking, 'If I can just make it to 90 days I'll be cured, I'll be free of this forever' just get on and enjoy the new you, that's it! from this point on. I met an ex-school friend and ex-addict. He said 'how are you getting on?' I said, 'I've survived 3 weeks.' He said, 'What do you mean you've survived 3 weeks?' I said, 'I've gone 3 weeks without watching porn or masturbating' He said, 'What are you going to do? Survive the rest of your life?' What are you waiting for? You've done it. You're free.' I thought, 'He's absolutely right. What am I waiting for?' You become free the moment you have that last fix. The important thing is to be happy about it from the start.' (adapted from Alan Carr - The Easy Way, 1985) This advice really helped me when I quit smoking, I think it applies to many addictions. Peace.
Great - I'm sure this is the right attitude to focus on the postive not the negative. It is so much healthier to say I AM going to do something than just I'm NOT going to do something. It gives focus, direction and positive motivation. Life is surely for doing things not just for preventing things! And think of all this new time you've got and what you're positively going to do with it! The possibilities are endless, aren't they!
Great thread! Never thought about it in this way, but it's really good advice that I'll be sure to look to in times of need.
It is an interesting point. I read something else relating this back to the counters that we all use - essentially that we should stop keeping count and just get on with it. My initial intention was to hit 30 days and then extend my counter, I'm wondering whether it's better to just hit 30 days and then not bother counting anymore, get busy living.
Hi, I think counters are great. Most of the guys here (including me) need to reboot their brains in order to have that final PMO. Breeking a decade-long habit may be easy for some people, but most of us will need to attempt it several times. I think the important thing here is to treat every attempt as the final one and always start it with that positive attitude.