Ok. On my first try, I got to 14 days which, in all honesty, was the best I have done in a while and trust me when I say it was like fighting World War 3 against my urges. But I relapsed and ever since, I can't seem to get back the determination in order to succeed. It's like I was playing a very hard video game and just when I am about to beat it the save file corrupts and I have to start all over again. If any of you have every experienced this, how did you get back your determination?
I like your video game analogy, however I think you may want to look at it like this. It's when you're about to beat the game and saying, "I give up! I can't beat this! I'm going back to level 1 because it's easy and makes me feel good." At least that's how I feel when I relapse. Someone else just went 2 weeks in their first attempt. I'll copy and paste what I said: Dude! I think I made it two days on my first attempt. Two weeks on your first try is fantastic! That shows that you have what it takes to kick this. Take encouragement from this. Yeah...you failed...we all have. The most important thing about failure is what you learn from it! Wallowing in self pity is natural but once you pick yourself back up, you have to look back and analyze what went wrong and where so that you can avoid it next time. Keep it up! You got this! Stay strong!
Hi Malik, you should remember what PMO caused you and what you want to do. That should motivate you enough As LegoT said you have to analyze what could beat you down, it may be some cues that caused you to PMO. There must be a thing caused u to do that, remove it and try again. It's about trial and error. If you gave up, you won't stop PMO, but if you keep trying you may stop it so keep going.
After I made 2 weeks for the very first time I relapsed. Now I have made it just over 2 weeks again. Don't think about trying to go 2 weeks again, what I did was to just take it 1 day at a time. It was really tough but if you persevere day by day the 14 days actually seems to go by quicker than you thought. I also relapsed many times before I got to the initial two week period. There were so many times that I thought there was no hope but each time I tried to do a few more things to make it easier - delete more triggers, make sure the trash is emptied, start to recognize situations that seem to make it easier (feeling tired or hungry), identifying other triggers and avoiding them as soon as you see one. And read a lot of accounts on ybop website as well as posts from all the different forums here to get a lot of perspectives and ideas.
I agree I should get rid of triggers but my problem is that my very lifestyle is a trigger. I am normally in my basement all by myself playing video games(march break) and I don't know why but playing games is always the trigger. Aside from games, I could watch anime but I get bored of that and it becomes another trigger. The only aspect of my life that isn't a trigger is probably T.V(that might be due to the fact that it is in the living room) but as we all know, one cannot watch T.V all day. I guess I could help out with my dad's store. No chance of me getting horny around raw meat lol but it is back breaking work. Anyways, thanks for the advice guys and I will keep trying as I always have.
