Maybe that's why it's so hard for me to quit this. The ordinary stuff has always been a turn off for me. I won't explain what I was into, nor will I name the sites I go to out of respect for this community, but I will say it started with, and is still centered around taboo stuff. Now I'm at the point where I'm questioning my sexuality.
Also went straight to taboo stuff and never had an interest in the vanilla stuff. Whenever I saw videos of missionary or something I never cared. I never once fantasized about actual sex with a woman. It’s a terrifying thought but the only way to know what it truly is going on with our sexuality is through PMO abstinence. Plenty of other guys on here who had HOCD or thought they were asexual recovered. But yeah thinking of how much longer our reboot may take considering we were never into vanilla stuff is straight up depressing.
Same situation here. Probably means hereditary fetishes which is a bit shit. That shouldn’t deter us though. Even with something that might not truly disappear, i know from experience that it can certainly fade until it’s not noticeable.
There is some if you look it up. Of course genetics when talking about fetishes is gray area and it isn’t good to be deterministic but, from what I’ve looked into, it seems as though there are only 2 ways of having a fetish that’s not developed through sexual escalation: either through trauma, or hereditarily. Who it is inherited from really just depends on the trait whether it has dominant or recessive genes in its own right. Like any research relating to genetic influence on sexual preferences, it is incredibly incomplete but there’s enough out there to show it certainly can have an influence. For the sake of giving an anecdotal reference, I found that me and my brother have had the same fetish without even escalating through porn. Of course you could try and make the point that it’s trauma induced from having the same environment but I find that unlikely when many people are often able to trace it to an event.
Inherited memory of all kinds makes a semblance of sense, but I file it in the "maybe" category. What it does provide is a way for us to think about our proclivities as a consequence of someone else's decisions/circumstances, so we don't bear the blame or guilt for it. That helps us resolve the problem, rather than get caught in it like a spiderweb.
Leave porn behind and give your brain a long break from sexual stimulation and sexual thoughts. Desexualize your mind. Even if you lapse, get right back up and continue on. Two things to avoid more than anything: edging and binging. Without the influence of porn, then you will be able to see who you truly are and what you truly like, good luck.
