Has anyone had repaired sexual attraction to wife after nofap?

I cant attest for wife as i am not married. I can say when i do NoFap i start thinking about woman more and without being influenced by porn i also start to dream about woman. usually i dont dream at all occasionally but never of anything sexual. when i do NoFap i start to have dreams about woman. its been a while since i have not had a successful streak in sometime . but that is what i notice and something you could not easily connect to porn use

 

Delete all the apps and everything man… you’ll just dig yourself deeper and deeper. You’re getting all this dopamine from the thrill of talking with new girls

and also, I had a similar issue when I was last in a relationship. The sex got boring and I had Ed issues…. Never have them with new girls, but I get bored of the same one pretty quick. Wondering if anyone can shed light on that. I’d love nothing more than to get married and start a family

 

I am 41 and have been married for almost 8 years. Can say that in my case when I work at my recovery, the attraction does come back. Then after a relapse, it diminishes. However the love is always there, but it is interesting how these urges and behaviors diminish that aspect of our marriage. I feel getting that attraction back is worth fighting for.

One interview I saw last month talked about how this side of life trains us in being a bad lover to our wife. When I thought about that, it really hit my heart as it was true. The flavor of the lifestyle varies, but this stuff does make us sexually unattracted to our wives and therefore less engaged. My wife wants more and this lifestyle has diminished how many times I can be with her.

Yet, what a beautiful gift to know there is a way to recovery.

Will also make the case my dad hid this stuff and eventually it came out when I was in high school. Never saw him in the same light. This is not just going to continue to effect your wife but if it does not get under control can damage your kids. No matter how well we bury it, their is a high probability something will reach the surface. Glad you are taking a look at this as it is life changing. Keep working at it my friend.

 

its none of my buisness but NoFap and hit the gym. maybe if she sees you are in much better shape she will feel the need to as well

 

Here’s my honest reply.
I was here about 4 years ago. As I recovered I grew increasingly attracted to her. We had a lot of great sex. Until I confessed my infidelity.
Nothing for almost 5 years now.
We are closer emotionally, but TBH, I’m not all that attracted to her. But I’m only 60ish days clean after 18 months of hooking up. So I have more work do do there.

 

Absolutely, I found myself attracted and aroused by my wife, who is not Barbie by any standards. But I'm not checking out other women, and thus I'm not comparing her to anyone. She becomes the only woman in the world, and thus the most beautiful woman in the world.
That's one of the damaging things that lust does to me. It steals away from my attraction to my wife, which ultimately steals from my own happiness and sex life.

 

Great stuff.

 

I have had it, it's very possible, may differ with different mind sets though

 

I guess it's like a circle: if you honestly feel attracted to her, she feels attractive. And if she feels attractive, she looks more attractive to you. Which makes you more attracted to her....

What I learned the hard way: women have incredible senses. If you do not find your wife attractive, she feels that somehow. Even if both of you try to cover it up.

 

When I was a teenager I was obsessed with my friend for years; we ended up dating 2 years later. Everything was fine in our relationship, however, I began looking at other women and thinking to myself I could do better. After a while my interest in her faded and I ended up dumping her, a decision I still regret. You must stop what you are doing in order for things to be mended, focus on your wife and rekindle your love for her. You will end up destroying everything you have created if you continue down the path of lust, turn towards your wife and give your all to her before it's to late.

 

Yes. They have a sixth sense we don’t fully comprehend.

 

Good chance she is picking up on your behavior and it's already affecting your marriage. It is taking focus and energy away from your primary relationship. Tough to break these bad habits...working on building intimacy with your wife instead might help.

 

Thirty two and seventy days in. Not sure how long into no pm but yes way more attracted to my wife now. And surprised because we are both super out of shape. A million times better. I have not m at all which i think helps. Plus she knows my issue so sometimes i can tell her i feel tempted. This is cool but i also know she worries plus she has told me we're done if i mess up. But not hiding anything and always being ready to go for me has worked wonders. Feel great in that area now. Still some struggles with temptation but trying to stay strong. Life has been great just got to stick to it even when its hard to

 

Hey bud,
I can understand you, I don't have today the time to read this entire thread, so please forgive me if I am adding something to the discussion that has already been added by somebody else, but I like to share my insight about this, because I was in the same spot and I successfully solved the problem.

A few years ago I started to look at her with disgust too!
I want to be honest, I also felt guilty to think about this, but I wasn't able to overcome this sentiment, so one day I decide to open the Pandora vase and I told her that she was getting too fat!
I did it because I was looking at her and I didn't like her anymore and I was thinking that was important for me to tell her the truth and hiding the truth was even worst than telling her the ugly truth
I also started noticing the very poor food choices that were putting her in a spiraling situation.
She was eating carbs every day and this behavior make her always hungry and eat more and more food, so I was also worried for her health
As you can imagine she hated me for months, but this reality check profoundly change her, because I never told her something so strong.
So 2 years ago she become a KETO fanatic and she is now in very good shape, more confident, more attractive and also she is more attractive to me too
I have also worked on my side too: for example, I stopped to compare her with all the chicks I see online and also I started to focus my attention on what I really like about her and ignore the normal human defects that everybody has.
Stopping porn plays a huge role too: since I stopped watching porn I also lost interest in not using porn stimulations like, Tik TOk, hot girls' pictures, etc. I now found them no more interesting and, to be honest, a little bit pathetic, this also change the way I looked at her!

Conclusion: tell her the truth in a positive way and also work on you: She is what you see but also you are the eyes that see her, so the job needs to be done both ways