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I need help.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by CasualMe95, Oct 12, 2015.

  1. I need help as the title says.

    I've been here since fall 2013 and although I've learned alot I haven't actually gotten anywhere. I still relapse occasionally.
    I keep telling myself that I can do this. But I never really do it. I never really put actions into my words. And this is frustrating because my PMO addiction is the only thing that is that way. In general I am a man of action, everyone who knows me know that whenever I say I'm gonna do something etc it always gets done.

    I love it when I'm on NoFap. I just become social and over all a better person. Why? I dont really now. It just comes natural.

    I figure the reasons I relapse is because I dont know how to hold the sexual tension when I see a really fit girl and second because I'm affraid that being in control is worse than PMO. I also know theres only one way to find that out.

    I wanna get somewhere with this. But I honestly dont know how. I've closed all doors that could be a distraction except being social and being outdoor.

    Right now I'm just wasting time it feels like. I recently watched a video of Gabe Deem and he explains exactly how my life was when I was at my worst. I had a gf yes, but thats it. No friends no nothing. Back then I didn't know about PMO addiction, its causes etc but I did know and so did she that I could not orgasm with her. That killed me inside because I was clearly attracted to her.

    Same thing went when I started becoming sexual active for real. And I think that could be one of the reasons I dont hook up girls from a club etc. Although I blame career and personal development (partly this is true) but also because I'm ashamed of my PMO addiction on why I've been single for almost 5 years. I know and feel that i watch porn because I'm sexually lonely.

    I'm getting way of topic here, thing is. I dont know how to approach this addiction without failing.

    Any questions, please ask!
     
  2. danayya

    danayya Fapstronaut

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    Hi,
    First thing, you don't need to blame yourself for this.
    When you feel alone, it provokes you to watch porn. After masturbation and you blame your self there is a
    scientific reason behind this.
    Watching porn is like drug addict, it takes to time to overcome that problem.
    Make yourself busy with your activities related to study, work and fitness.
    And you should have powerful goal in your life.
    I wish one day you will get rid of all these problems.
    All the best !!!
     
    Ahmed Achiles likes this.
  3. Thank you. I will do my best.
     
  4. Ahmed Achiles

    Ahmed Achiles Fapstronaut

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    Hey , don't blame your self, that's called addiction, for all what you say ,iam so glad to inform you that you passed half the way. Of treatment because of self-recognition..bud you know your problem and what stimulus you,okay.so don't get depressed .you need just 30 days to reform your neural passway when being stimulated so don't wait . Start now and be social as far as you can
    Wish you overcome that
     
  5. ChefDeep

    ChefDeep Fapstronaut

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    I was in the same position as you, maybe still am, depends on how you look at it. I would relapse every three to 7 days, making no progress. I joined nofap, went for a few extra days, but still couldn't make it anywhere I wanted to. Than, one day, after I relapsed, I had enough. I wrote down exactly how I felt, I drew a picture and put it in my room to remember that day, and I changed some habits that I thought I could never sacrifice (meditation, social media) I went for 42 days after, and I felt brand new. That was until I had the roughest week of my life and I needed a stress reliever, which at the end added more stress than it relieved. What I'm saying here is you need to find you breakthrough point, where you've just had enough. Write down how you feel, and every time you get an urge again, read that, and imagine yourself writing it. I'm only 14 and I'm doing well on my second breakthrough, on my 15th day so far. If I can do it, you most definitely can.
     
    Hutch, ichabodcr and CasualMe95 like this.
  6. Thats a very smart way of putting it. But you mean that I haven't hit my breakthrough point yet and thats why I'm still relapsing?
    I just, i really wanna get some place with this.
     
  7. ChefDeep

    ChefDeep Fapstronaut

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    It's up to you when you decide you've had enough. I look at it like this: (not trying to offend your efforts here) Most people say they want to be successful, but they don't want it bad, they just kinda want it. It's up to you to decide which person you're going to be from now on. You've got to dedicate your day to this recovery process. If that means meditating daily, stop going to parties, or stop hanging out with certain types of friends for a certain period of time, you have to be able to decide if you'll have to make these changes in order to change yourself. I know it sounds hard, but quitting this addiction opens up a whole new world of possibilities you can conquer.
     
    Hutch and Septimus like this.
  8. ThatOneGuy56

    ThatOneGuy56 Fapstronaut

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    You'll get there someday, a good streak takes a lot of trial and error as well as dedication. It's tough, but it can be done.
     
  9. I like the way you put it. I really do!
    And I like your insight. I can truly relate to what you mean.
    Its all down to me, do what you've gotta do. NOBODY can tell you what is right for you but yourself. Do what is best for you, and the true ones will be with you.
     
  10. "There are 7 days a week and someday isn't one of them" from NoFap Emergency.
    But I understand what you mean and you're right. It does take alot of failing until you discover how do push through. It just seems so long when you're below 14 days...

    "Dont complain about failing until you've failed more times than it took Thomas Edison to create a lightbolb"
     
  11. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    This.
     
  12. Anti-Porn Army Soldier

    Anti-Porn Army Soldier Fapstronaut

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    Install K9 and block everything which prompts you to relapse and I DO MEAN EVERYTHING. Trust me the initial days are hard as hell when you are trying to recover but with K9 it will be a lot easier, no porn filter is like a person trying to quit smoking while holding a cigarette in one hand.
     
  13. Congrelous

    Congrelous Fapstronaut

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    The problem is that it sometimes does some annoying shit like blocking downloads and such, but it is very good.
     
  14. Tried. Resulted in computer malfunction. Win 8 then, now 10.
     

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