Why the hell porn is so addictive?

Because it hijacks your natural biological desire to have sex and reproduce whilst providing endless novelty.

 

Because as kids we were offered the illusion of free and endless sex before we even knew the first thing about relationships or the opposite sex. And all of popular culture fed into this illusion. Then when we didn't get free and endless real sex like we were led to believe we would, we settled for free and endless virtual sex not realizing that we were falling for a trap that would cripple us in the real world.

 

It’s covered in the resources here, but the short answer is, because your brain has developed to find certain things rewarding, sex being one of them. Porn hacks that natural desire with an exaggerated dopamine response. Your body feels that yes, these things like study and work are okay, but the really rewarding thing is to look at porn. This is obviously not true. Porn is at absolute best a monumental waste of time. It’s not usually a best case scenario, though. At worst it’s taking advantage of another person for your own gratification, developing unrealistic expectations for how sex works and even what it is for, and indirectly inhibiting your ability to form successful real world habits and relationships.

Porn is bad, mmkay?

 

Long story short, is because it plays with the chemistry in your brain.

Porn itself, increases dopamine, during the arousal, and lastly, and in my personal opinion, most overlooked factor, as I only hear dopamine, dopamine, dopamine, dopamine, over and over, is the secretion of endorphins during orgasm.

Dopamine, is a very vital compound, almost anything pleasurable will increase the levels of dopamine in one person, is the compound that drives life itself, you do things, look for food, look to move out of bed and be physically active even, because they have a dopamine reward.

Now, porn, through a ridiculous supply of arousal, gives you spikes of dopamine, over, and over, and over, suddenly, things that reward you with less dopamine, don't feel as motivating, or as rewarding to do.

But porn does, there is an endless supply. It gets to a point where it quite literally changes your brain.

Then again, this is already terribly bad on it's own, but I personally don't think is the culprit of it's unbelievable addicting power, I'm quite sure, it's endorphins, the one that is secreted during orgasm or intense edging.

Endorphins, is the most addictive chemical in the brain, far more than dopamine, yet is more selective in terms of what makes it raise.

To put an example, even scrolling through social media, tik tok or anything of the sort, increases dopamine, as the anticipation of the next thing in your feed, THE HOPE, of it being something good and that you like, has that effect. In fact it can spike your dopamine hundreds of times per minute.

Yet, is nowhere comparable to porn, there is where endorphins, more selective, yet more potent, make the big difference.

Basically, porn makes your brain think you are having an incredible amount of sex, and rewards you as such, when actually you have been just beating your meat in front of a screen.

And it's a big BIG reward, as it's something you are not meant to get normally in life, on demand, with 20 different girls each day, as many times as you want.

Giving the end result of nothing else being comparable to it, so you go for it again, and again, and again...

 

Because sexual attraction was designed to make man lose their minds, to see a naked woman and say: "yes, I am going to fuck her, marry her, raise her kids, and spend at least 3,000,000$ on food , house and education for my kids, oh and I am also willing to give up my hobbies, vacations, gaming, to take care of her and 5 other strangers that come out from a hole in her body after 9 months she grew them there"

So sexual attraction makes you forget you are just going to spend most of you time, life and 3,000,000$ of your money.

So Porn , which shows you the same naked woman who is suppose to make you not caring to spend 3,000,000$. will for sure make you forget Homework, Exercise, working, or any other effort you should do.

the power of Porn is not a bug in your system, it's a feature. every time you go to a wedding, remember that you are fighting the same insane power that bought this couple to marry.

That also goes for woman: "wow, I see this hot guy, he might be Violent/Serial killer/Vampire , but I got to make him have sex with me and carry his children, getting into serious danger to my health being in pregnancy (a LOT of woman died in childbirth), give up my education and my dreams, and more - for the slim chance that my kid will survive his childhood (most didn't) and grew up to be a man"


I mean, do you have any idea how dangerous the world around you is ? a lot of woman died in childbirth, than a lot of kids died, you were probably losing your life at 30, 40-50 if you are lucky, 60 if you are very lucky. illness and disease will kill you very easily. and the wildlife and other humans are cruel. this is not encouraging growth or family planning. so the nature instead need to give you a drug so powerful, so addictive, so important, so rooted in you, to overcome all this fears and to try anyway.

 

I know how you feel... I've felt like this before, too. However, the "why?" is not important. It is just a distraction from the truth... and the truth is.. just don't watch it. If you analyze why porn is so addicting... then you are just feeding your addiction more... you are thinking about porn and thinking deeply about it. the truth is, just quit thinking about it. Any time a thought of porn comes into your mind, immediately recognize it and cut off the thought. As soon as the thought comes in, cut it off, cut the thought right out of your mind.

So in my opinion, don't worry about or even thinking about this question. Just don't think about it. Be free from it for good

 

Haha, wow! That is a fantastic way to put it! Thanks for that.

 

Holy shit. I think it's gonna be helpful to remind yourself that urges are just your biological instinct ringing which was created to make yourself reproduce and offer up your life for your offspring and wife. Being aware of this will definitely help fighting urges

 

Because it allows you to see endless images and videos of attractive women, something that we are programmed naturally to be attracted to, but at the same time it's also very unnatural because we aren't meant to be exposed to all that sexual stimuli, we aren't meant to see so much that we become desensitized and develop sexual dysfunction issues like PIED.

Think of before technology and the internet, even before porn magazines. You can be sure that PIED wasn't even a thing back then because the typical man maybe saw a small handful of women with their own eyes in real life throughout their entire lives, not hundreds that a porn addict will see behind a screen in a matter of hours.

 

It's definitely a very important milestone when dealing with porn addiction to realize that the urges are not intrinsic to porn itself, but are an expression of lust and a reproductive-pleasure seeking instinct.

In my experience you get to the point where you have "urges" specially triggered from real women, but they are actually your lust and instincts being triggered, we just have been conditioning ourselves to stratch that instinct itch, with a fake form of sexual relief, instead of doing what we are built for and the reason for their very existence, that is go out there, find a partner, have sex, have children.

 

Some people say that porn addiction is way more difficult to get rid off than substances like marijuana or cocaine. While the latter are a nice bonus that might be found in nature, the former is a deeply rooted human desire. Never have I ever struggled with any gaming addiction the way I struggled with porn addiction.

 

It's a cheap thrill, free and easy, you can see as many beautiful naked women as you want doing anything you want. It all gets reinforced, when will enough ever be enough? That is the allure and sickness of it. Never. Until we are finally done with it. It's made my life a living hell, how about you?

 

I can tell how it fucked up my youth:
1. Due to porn, I got anxciety level I shouldnt have, and it affected my career negatively + ability to approach women.
2. Time lost, watching & searching porn, could have been spent on creativity and socializing.
3. Erectile dysfunction made it even worse to keep girlfriends.
4. WOmen looked less beautiful, because of desentisation, making me unnaturally picky.
5. THanks to porn I got a skewed view of women and sexuality. Creepy freak type of behaviour around women. Thankfully its back to normal now.

 

You sound a lot like me here, I feel I am far over the worst in terms of things like anxiety, talking to women, being desensitised etc, how long did it take for you to get back to normal with normal erections?

 

Congratulations.

 

It took about a year at least for me to get back to normal erections. However, I relapsed several times a year, so I have a very prolonged reboot.
When I finally quit Tinder, and similar, it felt like an extra boost.
My general and social anxciety disappeared after 2-3 years.