What if you live in a shithole - the women of my age group in my town is utter trash - I utterly despise their 'celeb culture' they follow, more than the Spotify or Netflix they throw their hard earned cash to most of the good ones have already graduated and left or got married
I agree. The reverse is true too, if you get into pmo while in a relationship it continues after lol. In fact it can be worse in these situations because you then rationalize not being in a relationships etc. Effectively choosing pmo over anything else. It's especially bad if you break a marriage because you can then just get trapped in the addiction with no reason to change.
The OP is brilliant advice if you're looking to make life more difficult for yourself and others. Or if you're trying to reinforce codependency.
I have a girlfriend and I went through much of my reboot and healing process with her, I'll say that it helps with PIED, to be able to have someone to hug and cuddle with helps rewire the brain to get used to a real woman instead of pixels on a screen. It also gave me something to look forward to, why watch porn when I can do it for real with her, so it was like a coping mechanism that helped me stay away from porn. This is my experience.
I disagree with All the people saying it can't help. That's nonsense. It definitely helps to have someone in your life. Especially a wife or a girlfriend. Even if some still are addicted and have a partner it doesn't mean that a partner doesn't help. Don't bash the op everyone has a different situation. Yes some people need to learn not to depend on others and quit even though they have sex and a girlfriend but for others having a girl to help them rewire is a huge and necessary step. So it depends on the situation. However I usually see having a wife or girlfriend as generally a positive.
I think you are missing context here. OP seems to suggest that getting a partner will sort out pmo addiction, which is not true. Yes having a partner may help (especially if they are understanding), but they can also be unhelpful and even drive you deeper into addiction if they leave you or act out because of lack of sex or whatever. Also, people still pmo even after sex with their partner. So just having a partner and sex still does not stop the addiction in most cases actually. So yes, it depends on situation, and if you get a partner naturally then be honest with them and try to heal. But do not get a partner as an escape, or a replacement for addiction. You'll now just move into codependency as someone has stated.
I see your point but for many people it is not that simple. I think the demons you have you bring with you into a relationship. Sure, its might make it easier but it won't just vanish for most of us. I dragged my porn into my relationship. Sure it is easier to back off but it is always hovering and I am still battling.
I seem to be starting to fall into this trap as well. Are you saying the solution is to find someone that can better suit your sexual preferences? I often find myself regretting being with my girlfriend because she’s not what I’d like her to look like, but she’s also the most caring loving partner I could ever ask for. Without even batting an eye, she was willing to support me through this battle of porn addiction. Have my sexual preferences just changed from porn permanently or did I just ignore them in the beginning because of what I fell in love with on the inside, or has porn just brainwashed me to have unrealistic or very difficult expectations to satisfy? I feel so lost in what I even know or think I know anymore
This is opposite for me and my wife, I get regular sex a couple nights a week, but would love for her to initiate it - would love to have morning sex again, but that doesn't happen when you're a parent. If her sex drive matched mine I would have given up p0rn years ago!
This would appear to be the case if the mind thinking about the issue is of the one track variety. Even outside of PMO there's a lot of addicts who have problems with relationships, that's why there are groups like Al-Anon, ACA, CoDA dealing with codependency etc. Of course if the reader/writer doesn't have the perspective from life experience they probably won't see this.
Doesn't sound like real experience in LTR, when partners aren't necessarily going at it every night anymore, or if she is not in the mood, one may be left hanging and be easily tempted to P all the more, especially as one will experience constant chasers if having periodic sex.
I used to date a girl, she could've been prettier but was one of those who never shown interest in her own appearances - it felt ungrateful to dump her, so felt trapped in a passionless relationship. It didn't stop me from going back to 'porn', I mean looking at models at luxury lingerie websites - it felt like a relief when we split
sexual satisfaction is important in relationship... there're other benefits from strong relations but it's difficult or nearly impossible if you don't feel attracted to her.