I'm trying my best. Bust sometimes I fantasize without thinking and sometimes when I think. Does fantasizing for 30-60 seconds count as a relapse? Or does it just slow down the reboot process? If someone could help and explain this for me I would be verry glad.
There are so many resources on this site, and frankly I feel that most people come here without reading up on the other posts and ask there question. This question has been asked numerous times. You need to define what you want to achieve. By conventional community definitions, no fantasizing isn't in moderation. Those of us looking to totally reboot, believe that it isn't a relapse as long as you turn away from it. Although, fantasizing definitely isn't helping your relapse. As I say so many times, quit playing with fire. You don't need or benefit from tempting yourself. If you find yourself lusting, fantasizing, try to train yourself to divert away. It will go along way if you can.
My understanding of the way the brain works is that it can't discern between the reality and the fantasy - the same areas of the brain fire when we think about something as when we are actually doing it. Having said that, in terms of physical reality, thinking about porn and sex is different than actually looking at porn and masturbating. It just activates and reinforces the familiar brain patterns, which is what rebooting is about - getting out of the familiar brain patterns and establishing new ones. If you haven't yet, I recommend going to www.yourbrainonporn.com - a lot of good material about the brain and what we are dealing with.
I'm sorry If I'm asking stupid questions, but honestly my english is really bad, especially when it comes to understand stuff writed in english. Believe me, I have searched alot and tried finding enough information.
Yes, Thank you. I think so. Fantasizing isnt a relapse, only If I masturbate or orgasm. But it could slow down the healing process a bit? If I fantasize, i just tell it gtfo my head.
