Seriously Fucked

I really don't have any good advice.
I can just say that the fight is tough at first and then surely comes ease. You just need to start.

 

If you can get a streak going away from P and M, you will experience some brain clarity and can use that to build a longer streak away from masturbation and alcohol. You are worth it. I would also say that this is nearly impossible to overcome by yourself - you need the support of others. There is great power in telling this out loud to someone you trust, whether that be a NoFap weekly group or SAA type of group, therapist or trusted friend. More powerful if it is someone who has experienced this personally and in in recovery. Best wishes.

 

Try to break the connection between m and alcohol. That is scary and building dependencies together is dangerous.

 

I hear you pal. I deffo had a connection with M and Booze, no question. Hard part is that there are either existing conditions or neuro conditions that you have created through this behaviour. Breaking will be dependent on you having a big enough counter - it's not for everyone but a belief that you are not alone, there is something/someone more powerful than you and that you need help; these are big steps. For me it's making a decision that I no longer want to live like that which soundes easy, its not but it is liberating. Check in to this site every day and try to give advice/feedback to others on their journey - be humble and take help. Be strong!

 

What do you mean by the crash being intense after masturbation?

 

Good podcast on "The 5 Lies That Keep Us Coming Back to Porn" from Porn Free Radio, which has a ton of good podcasts relevant to this struggle. Check it out: https://recoveredman.com/075