How to have a healthier view on women?

Like @disallowedname said; smartphones have a high addiction rate. But next to this; woman are programmed to be a peacekeeper and keep all of their relations healthy. For millions of years this was a safety strategie so woman could find protection by other woman when their husband died in a war or just never came back. Woman are still programmed in this very same way and the way how they do this is by chatting. Chatting keeps the relation healthy and strong. In fact; this is so programmed in the brain that the nummer one annoyance for woman is that their husband doesn't communicate at home after a long day of work!

 

Just read the book: No More Mr. Nice Guy!

 

Two notes

1) everyone is attached to their phones all the time
2) maybe because they don't want to engage with a stranger in public?

 

I'm not trying to stir up this discussion, but for myself I am distancing myself from all "this is because for millions of years" and "when a woman sees her husband after a long day of work" explanations. Playing out stereotypes isn't going to help anyone.

To your original question @helpfuldude , I can't talk about therapy or something because I haven't tried. What you are describing is - for me personally also - a longer process that is affected by how I engage with women every day and what I see on my phone, my computer etc. Also a reason I'm quitting porn. About the body ideals that manifest in our brains at some point, another thing I'm doing is avoiding Instagram's 'perfect sporty hot body' section, which isn't easy. Follow people who you naturally find attractive / smart / funny and make that the norm of what you're seeing on a daily basis. I think only then your brain can unlearn the unrealistic beauty and sexuality ideals and learn to be attracted by what you intellectually already know you'd find attractive.

Hope this is somewhat comprehensible, feel free to message me!

 

I think this attitude of OP is nowhere near healthy, us females also have a drive for reproduction and survival. And let me tell you the reason OP acts this way is because of porn-induced conditioning. Because girls who have a problem with PMO also fantasize about any attractive man they see. It's due to the dopamine chaser effect.

 

I don't think any of these thoughts are necessarily "wrong" in and of themselves. I mean alot of guys, if being honest, would state the same things. I think instead of trying to eradicate them from your thoughts altogether, a more practical approach might be to work on seeing women in a more holistic sense. So instead of just as objects of physical attraction, learn to appreciate their many other facets - their feelings, moods, dreams, opinions, career skills, life experiences, etc.

I'm reminded of an interview I heard by George R.R. Martin who wrote Game of Thrones. He was asked about how he wrote female characters, because he's pretty good at creating believable ones, with complex internal motivations, etc. He responded simply by saying "Well, you know, I've always considered women as ... people."

That's it see, they're people, with multiple dimensions, just like us. Anything you can do to cultivate this may help you - talking to them, reading books written by them, looking at art made by them, learning about how they've lived at different times in history, and in different cultures, how they have different roles they play - girlfriend/wife, sister, mother, friend, co-worker, caretaker, etc. Anyway just an idea - hope that helps.