Day 9 Hell Mode! Journal for today: https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/the-war-on-my-soul.251849/page-2#post-2272943
Day 27 hell mode: Well I could write pages but I like it fast I studied like a mad Basically all day I focused at my best because I needed it Because you know, it was an hard day all day, so I focused on studying and I managed to stay clean and kept the hell mode The fool is checking
Day 15 for me, I had a pretty successful day today. I had some really negative experiences that caused emotional pain. Usually, this would usually lead to a porn binge, in order to mask the emotional pain I was feeling (or to distract from it for a while). Instead, I chose to just feel the feelings. It was incredibly uncomfortable because all I wanted to do was to soothe this pain. Afterwards, I realised that emotional pain is not that bad. It's like having the flu, it's really uncomfortable but bearable. Today was a huge win. One of the major causal events of my relapses was experienced and no relapse occured.
Really inspiring, I was running my whole life, running away from my problems to not feel this pain. The longer you run, the harder it will hit you. I realized after my last relapse, that this is the way of the world, but that is bearable. I shape my own future and I will stand my ground!
When your happiness was highest and depression was lowest, what activities would you do? Before you had many feelings of depression, what brought you joy? I always encourage social activities. I love dancing because we are making a beautiful community, song and dance are like food and water for our social needs, it is physical exercise, and there is affectionate physical touch that is healing. If you are interested in my dancing, you should look up on the Internet "Contra Dancing." It is one of the easiest dances, everyone is very welcoming, and the experts enjoy dancing with beginners. I love it. Physical exercise is maybe the best thing you can do for your body. Your body and brain work better and you produce chemicals that bring you happiness. If you like to read about science, there is SO MUCH research about the benefits of exercise. So I encourage group physical activities like sports, hiking with people, dancing, and many things I can't think of. Yoga is very good, too! If you like church, a good religious community is healing. In my city, there are many places that have game nights for everyone. The 3 factors that helped me are social, cheap, and consistent. Also, you can reach out to your friends to hang out more often. I need to do this more. Do you have anymore questions?
Day 0 I might just do the normal hard mode. Not because I don't want to improve myself, but just because it kinda feels like I'm improving myself for the wrong reasons. Not actually having a desire to.
Also you inspired me to make an Avatar themed challenge! Check it out in my signature and on this forum