90 days made me a monster... but Im losing motovation

You've answered your own question. There have clearly been many benefits already, so why go back to masturbation just because you are single?
Somebody posted the other day about 400 days and asked if they can now masturbate, so it seems that this process is more about the changes made than the days achieved.
However, you could try masturbating and see how you feel in the hours and days after. Up to you..

 

You are losing motivation because you had a 90 days challenge and you have completed your mission. I can honestly say that you took your challenge seriously. Your brain was literally on fire. But now that you have nothing to fire your brain you are losing focus. Our brain can't sit still. It works for accomplishments that brings us fun. If you give you brain some productive task it wil grow you gold. But if you give nothing productive it will still want to have fun. What's the most "fun thing" brain knows?
I think you got the point.. Immerse yourself into a new life goal, have a timeline, and go...!!!

 

I hit 90 days earlier this year...and 3 days later was back to zero. I got too comfortable. This happens to everyone.
You need to refocus and fire up that urge to commit.
Frankly, anybody can do a few days and feel like the king. Then, reality sets in and your addiction knows it's got you by the throat.
Tomorrow I will hit 90 a second time. Big deal. 90 means nothing if my commitment is a big 0.
Get angry, don't get weak. Get fired up, don't get whiny. Get serious, don't get lazy.

 

You are now in a place that you wished to be in for 12 years.. Just because the past knocks on your back, it doesnt mean you have to turn around.