Day 8/14 without PM Last night I was feeling so horny, than instead of get alone and drown on PM, I convinced my wife to have sex, and we had such a great O (in her words). For me its the heal I was searching for. I got Very inspired by successfull stories forum, there are plenty of moving stories. Preparing my mind to the next week I'll be travelling alone. Certainly gonba need the help of you, buddies.
Dont even know where to start. My day started so well. I had my goals and plans for the day set. Few hours later, i decided to check scores from the australlian open. I googled the female tennis star and a picture of her in a pretty way i had never seen. And that was it, i decided to check on more photos of her and a thought came to me. What are you doing here? I listened and left the browser. But the page was still open, unfortunately it seems that was on purpose so that when next i enter my browser i can stumble on them. The sad thing about all that happen is that, i ddnt experience any strong urges. It was like my body and mind just took over till the very end.
I even hard oppurtunities to stop but i just ddnt. I just kept moving gradually to the real deal. I left the page to call my accountabilty partner/ counselor and before calling a thought told me to not call because i may disturb him. I wanted to message you guys but i felt no one would reply immediately. It was opening this forum to write to you guys that i saw that theres a panic button for situations like this. The only thing odd about the lead up to this point was that i chose to have snack while going to buy bread for breakfast. And my spirit told me that having that snack was a sign of indiscipline. Please guys if you are half way in this challenge, don't stop, choose not to give up cause the feeling sucks. I was almost tempted to lie to you guys but i chose not to. I don't know why i cant use the same will power in telling the truth to also resist temptation.
I realised that the mistake i keep making is not seeking help before the deed is done. I usually seek help after. Smh. I'm in my early 20s and i need to get my life together. This Pmo feels like its making me stagnant.
Day 10 of nofap, day 3 of 14-day challenge. Today the urges were real and strong. But I have to keep reminding myself that I'm stronger than my urges. #noFapIn2019
Day 2! I don't remember what happened yesterday, quite honestly u.u maybe I had some difficult moments again, but the "tactic" was able to kill them (I truly don't remember! I was stuck on the computer in a distraction loop, but that was sorted out -blocked- so now I should be better for today) Also I'll change it up a bit and update at night! Besides solving the memory problem it could also motivate me for surviving the night clean
0/14 HARDMODE Fantasies and bad ideas (to act out) are popping up in my head now and then. I'll treat them as if they were the thoughts of another person, not mine. I'll stay accountable about fantasizing too and check in on every day I can.
Hey friend, I felt many times like I was possessed because I couldn't help myself, I was on automatic mode ignoring the logic, the truth, the guilty. That's why we're here, I guess, and why this experience of share stories is so powerfull. On next time you'll feel more open to call for help, even on the automatic mode. Don't judge yourself too hard, and keep your head up.
Day 13/14 - just keeping myself out the house and busy has kept me away from any urges to masturbate, looking forward to each day now, as the dopamine receptors rewire.
I´ve just made it through the 7 days challenge a couple of days ago and I´m feeling strong now! I thought of trying a 365 days challenge, but I´m just gonna stick with the 14 days now DAY 1.... GO!!