Introduction

Hi @RenewedThought and welcome here! You’re in the right place. Here you will be enabled to make the necessary changes in your life. We’re here for you. Let us know if you have any questions or if you would be willing to share more of the specifics of your addiction. Also, please let us know what your specific goals are. Take care. You’ll do great!

 

RenewedThought, thanks for sharing that. It appears to me that you sincerely want PMO out of your life, and if so, good for you! I would suggest the following course of action:

1. Have a firm resolve to do whatever it takes to overcome this addiction. This means that you have to be brutally honest with yourself and your new friends on this site. You may have to disclose things that make you uncomfortable. You may have to install porn blocker software on your computer and smart phone. You may have to go through difficult withdrawal symptoms several times over the next year or so.

2. Start your day counter and start a journal in the age group appropriate forum under the logs section. This will be of great benefit to you as you will be able to track your progress, set goals and track them, and allow others to read your journal, give suggestions and encourage you along the way. Do this, it will make a big difference.

3. Set goals for yourself other than just no PMO. You need to prove to yourself that you can control your own destiny. Maybe you could make a goal to exercise daily or to write in your journal daily. Set a goal that gets you out of your comfort zone. I take only cold showers - which is hard to do but I prove to myself that I control my own destiny. You need to build up your ability to exercise willpower in your life again. Setting goals and achieving them will help you gain back self confidence. You will prove to yourself that you can do difficult things and that you are not a quitter.

4. Be ready to experience difficulties and heartbreaking relapses. “No PMO” is a journey, not a one time resolution. You will experience relapse many times. You must resist the urge to beat yourself up every time you do. You can be disappointed but you need to view each setback as a learning opportunity. How did you relapse? What were the circumstances that lead you to fall? You learn something each time and resolve to not fall for the same trap the next time. There may be multiple reasons why we PMO. We need to discover each reason by trial and error and learn how to deal with each reason in a healthy way. Maybe it’s loneliness, or when you are extra tired, etc. Be ready for many disappointments. But don’t beat yourself up each time. Look at it as a mistake and that you now know what to do to not repeat the same mistake. You iteratively become wiser and stronger.

5. Follow others on this site. Read their journals and see what their setbacks were. You can gain knowledge and ideas from them. You can even become good friends with them and you can help each other through those tough withdrawal symptoms. This is crucial.

6. Get ready to do the most difficult thing you’ve done in your entire life. This requires serious effort and resolve. It requires resiliency. How long will you keep going? I personally am committed to keep fighting PMO for the rest of my life, even after PMO no longer plagues me. I’m not trying to scare you, I just want you to know how much work will be required. A half-hearted effort will not get you the results you are looking for.

These are just a few thoughts I had. I’m available if you would like to have a private conversation about this. Feel free to PM me if you have questions on how to do any of the above. Best of luck to you - your journey starts today .