Hello everyone I'm a 24 year old male and I relapsed last night and I'm sick of it. I've have clean time over a day but never over 10 days. I found the community months ago but never really used it to help with my urges and maybe that was the mistake I've made. Today I pledge to be apart of this community everyday and with the strength I will overcome I'm enemy which is pmo.
It really helps - a lot of times these days if I have the urge to look at something I just automatically open the site and start reading and communicating -- it's a choice. Strong sexual desire does not have to equal PMO; it can equal coming to this site to get support or to encourage others. It can equal worshipping God. It can equal being creative. It can equal whatever you want.
After the relapse the strong sexual desires are so strong and anxiety and depression is at a all time high that's what I'm going through right now
The anxiety, depression and unwieldy desires should drive you to God for grace, mercy and strength. Letting those things drive you to PMO will only make your plight and misery worse. Everytime you get the urge for PMO let the sensation of fear wash over your being for the suffering that lies behind it if you give in.
Someone told me this past weekend the people who actually change are the ones who really wanted it. If you want to change you have to will power and that's what I've mostly been afraid of is change but I'm on the road of Getting past failure and nofap is going to have to be my fb Snapchat and Instagram
Relapses are setbacks, but they're also valuable lessons about yourself. The next time you relapse (if you do again, but I'm cheering for you!), don't beat yourself up about it. Instead, take a deep breath and try to answer these questions: What happened during the day today, other than your relapse? Has any of that same stuff happened on other days where you also relapsed? How do you feel about the day as a whole? Did you feel that way about the other days that you relapsed? Were you feeling lonely, hungry, tired, or stressed out? How did you respond to these things? How long ago was your last relapse? Do you find yourself only being able to stay clean for regular intervals (e.g. I can only stay clean for two days before I crack)? How did you feel after the relapse? Do you always feel this way after you relapse? What did you do immediately after you relapsed? Do you always do that after you relapse? These are just some questions to get you started. If you answer them honestly and sincerely, I think you'll start to see some patterns emerge. An honest answer to any one of these questions will give you information you can use the next time you start feeling urges to go back to porn. If you're having trouble keeping track of the answers to these questions, try keeping a relapse journal. It will help you a lot! For example, let's take "How long ago was your last relapse?" Let's say you think about it and the answer is about a week. Furthermore, you discover that the urges always start to get pretty bad after a week. Now, you know that after your next a week of sobreity, you probably need to start thinking about doing something different with your time. That's just one example. Relapses suck, but they always happen for a reason. You can learn what those reasons are and you can use that information to prevent them in the future. It's going to be a very personal journey, and I'm not saying it's easy at all. I'm just saying that you can do it, and that it's well worth the effort.
Thanks for this really, I have a problem being personal with myself and that's one of the biggest problems with me. I've observed myself and I live from the outside in which means I let the vibes from the world dictate what goes on inside instead of living inside out which for example means bring my vibe into the world. It's really deep and that's what I'm currently struggling with also.
A simple but true thought for you. Best wishes, “Failure is constructive feedback that tells you to try a different approach to accomplish what you want.” ― Idowu Koyenikan
Where does the world end and you begin? It is difficult to see. You are not your body, nor your thoughts, nor your experiences, nor your ego. You are more than all of that.
