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New to the forum--I've got the PMO addict blues.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Carrying that Weight, Oct 11, 2018.

  1. Oct 11, 2018 #1
    Carrying that Weight

    Carrying that Weight New Fapstronaut

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    Hey everybody, not really sure where to begin here but I just wanted to introduce myself--I have engaged in PMO for 11 long years (started at age 13, I'm 24 now) but I didn't really realize that I was badly addicted until 2011-2012 or so. Needless to say, I am REALLY struggling with it, which is why I wanted to join an online community of folks who are in a similar boat. **Oh, and I should probably add that you can call me CTW for short, I know my username is kind of long.**

    I am at a loss for what to do. Excessive PMO usage has caused my sexual desire around real women to become very inconsistent. For a while, my sex drive around real women was nearly zero--that's how bad the damage was. No libido. No erections. Nothing. Now, although my pornography usage has dropped significantly compared to what it used to be (used to be every day, sometimes multiple times a day--now it's just weekly edging, occasional PMO every few weeks, occasional binges on REALLY bad days), and my sex drive is better than it was a few years back, I am still struggling with getting to the point where I can feel ready to experience the real joys of a romantic relationship (including sex).

    As someone who has struggled greatly with social anxiety for years, and has only ever had one girlfriend, I'm definitely in a serious predicament because I feel that I am quickly running out of time. I am well within the age range where it is very wise to begin the "settling down" process (marrying, having children etc) and I feel that this addiction is holding me WAY back.

    Sorry for this crybaby rant guys, or if this seems way overdramatic, but I felt safe reaching out to the forum because I know that at least some of you can understand where I am coming from or can at least express your sympathies.
     
    Carrying that Weight, Oct 11, 2018
    Carrying that Weight, Oct 11, 2018
    #1
    Hros and Satchi like this.
  2. Oct 11, 2018 #2
    Hros

    Hros Fapstronaut

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    Welcome and good luck!
     
    Hros, Oct 11, 2018
    Hros, Oct 11, 2018
    #2
  3. Oct 11, 2018 #3
    SimonL66

    SimonL66 Fapstronaut

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    Hello and welcome to the forum. It sounds like you are already making good progress with reducing the amount of P that you use, well done.
    You are in the right place for help and support . Come back here often as you continue your journey.
    If you are new to NoFap I would urge you strongly to read and follow the 'how to use nofap' guidelines. If you have trouble finding them on the forums please ask and someone can send you a link. They really helped me get started. Don't be 'at a loss of what to do' - start by following the nofap steps.
    Secondly I would challenge your assumption that "it is [time] to begin the "settling down" process (marrying, having children etc) and I feel that this addiction is holding me WAY back" . Take a moment to read the contributions in the these forums from those 30+, 40+, 50+ and older . They are proof that you can marry, settle down , have children etc whilst still maintaining this addiction. You are actually in a very good position having started to take action on this in your 20s (I didn't until I hit 50!). By all means take action to address whatever is holding you back in building relationships , but don't blame it all on PMO. Of course it helps to get that under control too but it's not the only thing to focus on.
    Good luck , and as i said above, keep coming back here for support.
     
    SimonL66, Oct 11, 2018
    SimonL66, Oct 11, 2018
    #3

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