My thoughts in this moment in time. Block the porn. Obliterate the denial. Abandon the pride of who think you are or were for the sake of who you will become. Stop accociating yourself with the porn you've watched. That's exactly the nature of the disease. No matter what you tell the people closest to you, they won't understand fully. They don't have your memories, your scenes, your darkness. They see who they know; the real you. But a faded and troubled version limiting their own potential. This is not who you are. This is an obstacle. This is exactly the lesson you need in order to love yourself. It's a choice to be something else. That's all it is. This choice is worth whatever price you have to pay... even losing pride and concern for the jusdgements of others. Stop the denial. Admitting it's a problem doesn't make you less of a person, it makes you more of one. It makes you honest. Honest with yourself. Lose your pride. Buy the blocker. See the shrink. Tell your wife. Tell your mom. Own your shit. Leave it behind.
