being a virgin

I know what you mean. I'm at a bit more of an extreme, having never had a girlfriend but it's pretty much the same sort of thing. The same question "what's wrong with you?" comes up as well. My roommate will tease me on the subject of still being a virgin pretty frequently and a lot of people just jump to the conclusion that I'm gay. Most of my friends know that's not the truth and just accept it as a fact of life that I don't usually try too hard to get a girlfriend. In my experience, people will accept it a lot better if you accept it yourself as well. Most of the time when I tell someone that I've never had a girlfriend I do it jokingly or present it as a fact I'm well aware of and comfortable with. People usually respond a lot more respectably when I'm comfortable with it. In the past when I would present the information like it was the bane of my existence, people would be much less supportive and ask me what I did wrong and what's wrong with me. But that's just my experience with it. People generally look down on me for having not had a girlfriend, I can tell without them saying it. And that's pretty much just the way it is, if you're still a virgin after high school something is wrong with you according to the standard of society. If you accept it as a fact that you haven't lost it quite yet, it shouldn't bother you so much.

 

Ignorance is bliss. The people who say such things sound like uber ignorant shallow minded douche mongers in all honesty. I would like to give them a bro slap across their pretty little faces and then strap them into a hypnosis chair like Mugatu strapped Zoolander into and force them to watch video after video of what happens to people who begin having sex at a young age, ok maybe I crossed a line there and maybe that makes absolutely no sense...

also these ignorant little anti-virgin bastards should be required to read J.D. Unwin's classic study Sex and Culture.

But then the media is probably the biggest culprit here, warping the minds of generations. Sexual mores completing disappearing definitely are a result of mass media. Oh you're 18 and still haven't fucked yet? What's wrong with you?

When I was in high school my friends brother and his friends had a game to see how many freshman girls they could bang, and kept score. Weather the storm gentlemen. Better days await you in the coming years.

"In our oversexed society, where we are supposed to be super sexy all the time and according to "experts," be horny all the time too, the topic of abstinence is a strange one. Virtue and chastity used to be the norm only 60 years ago.

Now we are told by various health "experts" how many times were are supposed to be getting our groove on in any given week. This sage advice usually disregards whether the reader is even married or in a committed relationship! "After all, that was so 1950s! Aren't we past that? Can't we just have random hookups and not bother with relationships?"

Women are made to feel inferior and ugly if they are not doing the horizontal mambo at least 5 times a week. Men are made to feel less masculine if they are not ready to mate with every half way decent looking woman who crosses their path. In Western Culture, human happiness and sexuality are in complete decay.

I hate to break it to the "experts" who seem to think I need to be spilling my seed all over the place, but human beings aren't built that way! We are very emotionally complex creatures. And whether some animal rights activists want to argue with me or not, we have something extra that animals don't: self-awareness. We have the the spark of Divinity within us. We are the sons and daughters of Heavenly Parents.

Our procreative powers carry with them serious responsibilities, not only because we can transmit life to offspring, but because humans are emotionally complicated. We need certain emotional requirements met before we can be physically intimate with another. And it is wrong to try to circumvent and sacrifice the emotional, divine aspect of ourselves for physical gratification!

When did self-restraint become so "unhealthy" and "unnatural"? When did discipline and self-respect become the enemy of happiness? Now I am not, for a minute, going to suggest that a celibate lifestyle is for everyone or should be maintained for an entire lifetime. But there are advantages to celibacy, that the materialistic, instant gratification people seems to have forgotten. Let's take a look at them:

Avoid sexually transmitted diseases.
There is no risk of unwanted pregnancy.
No marriage to someone solely because of an unwanted pregnancy.
Save money on contraception.
Avoid the heartbreak, regret, anger and emotional turmoil that a failed sexual relationship brings. Avoid giving away something precious, only to be left feeling used and worthless.
Learn how to love unconditionally rather than lust. Relationships based on lust are often doomed to fail, since once the lust that held them together has subsided; it leaves behind a void of emptiness. Relationships based on love are more concerned with the unchangeable inner person rather than outer appearances that are changeable over time.
Enjoy healthier dating without having to focus on sex. Many couples report that having sex ruined their otherwise strong relationship. They somehow stopped getting to know each other as sex became more and more a focus.
Enjoy feeling emotionally healthy and stronger, more able to face the future. Many people use sex as an escape from the disappointments and pain in their lives, only to find that sex brings them more problems than it solves.
Waiting for sex until marriage is likely to increase your chances of a happy and lasting marriage. Studies have shown that people who have sex before marriage have an increased risk of getting divorced.
Being able to focus your creative powers on a higher purpose or mission."

- A wise, righteous dude-

 

Honestly being a virgin or not doesn't define you. You are must more than that. People who view it as a defining factor are just stupid its completely ridiculous. Focus on yourself. Take their insults but remember that you know something they don't that in the long run the girls that guys dream about they don't care how many girls you've slept with they like you for who you are. You think she'll choose some frat guy who drank and slept around or the guy who focused on building the fundamentals of himself. Flirting, having an edge being smart being confident being aggressive.

There are things to focus on but sleeping around isn't. Besides I guarantee you those guys probably pmo and eventually they may not be able to get it up but guess what you already started on the right path and when the time comes you'll be ahead. We are the sad generation of 20 year olds needing viagra. class school coffee shops the mall. Meet girls and when you find the right one do it because of her personality not just looks. After one date if its just looks you will go crazy trust me.

Would you rather have slept with no one or slept with 20 girls and gotten like HIV or Herpes. No amount of sleeping around will make an stds worth it. STIs suck to. Your life has only begun`the whole virginity thing its meaningless to the bigger picture which is you becoming the greatest version of yourself. Good luck man

 

It's a good thing that you're a virgin- don't give it away to anyone but your wife someday. And if you never marry, don't give it away at all. Read through the threads to see the self-destruction which is the direct consequence organically connected to the action of dissipating one's sexual energies carelessly. Learn from others' mistakes, and don't listen to the counsel of your foolish peers or the broken girls who belittle you for not whoring about.
We don't give up sex because it's dirty or profane, but because it's sacred and beautiful- if it weren't then we wouldn't be blessed in the giving of that gift.
I don't know that I've ever met anyone, ever, who has authentically gained wisdom or knowledge or charity (or anything else that matters) from multiple sexual exploits. Have you ever met someone who seems to have profited in any real way from sleeping around? (profited something other than an unintended pregnancy or STD or broken heart I mean) Ugh, can you imagine getting to your wedding night and having to tell your wife that she isn't the first? And worse, that you gave this gift away that was meant for her not because you really wanted to, but because some broken, sad, oversexed girl wanted company in her misery and you gave into peer pressure, and it just seemed to be what everyone else was doing?
Resolve to stay a virgin until your wedding night.
Also, I'm not sure when "innocence" became an insult. It seems like whatever the opposite of innocence is would be kind of a negative thing to become. There's a lot behind those belittling words from those "friends". They think themselves superior just because they've experienced something you haven't. But:
1. if you have sex for the first time on your wedding night- I really believe you'll experience something they never will.
2. it is the waking man who understands sleep. Direct experience does not have an exclusive claim as to how we come to know something truly

 

Your not alone mate , the majority of Religous people are Virgins

 

Be glad you are a virgin. Do not believe the lie that being so makes you less than anyone else. The world is filled with people who were promiscuous in their younger years then later with years and maturity lived to regret it. I was 27 when I first had sex... Pretty late by today's standards. I'm 48 now... I wish I had waited. I remember telling the woman I would have my first sexual encounter with that was a virgin. She was literally heartbroken that she could not say the same. In fact she asked me if it bothered me that she wasn't. Protect your virginity but at the same time.... Reboot and get off porn. If you are consuming a steady diet of depravity for years... When you do have sex. It will be disastrous. I speak from experience. PMO drenches your brain with a polluted and unnatural perspective. Flush it from your system now... So that later. You reap the rewards.

 

Your identity isn't tied to being a virgin and there is nothing wrong with being a late bloomer. Don't let yourself be fooled.

 

I lost my virginity last year (I was 24) it was with a friend. It was one of the worst experiences ever, she kept clawing into my back, insisted on keeping the lights off despite the fact neither of us had done it, the most embarrassing part of this story would be when she said to me "That's my asshole idiot" we kept trying but it wasn't that good. A few weeks later I met another girl and it was much better, she was nice, we ended cuddled afterwards and napped together. If there's something I want you to take from this story it's not the sex that matters but who you have it with.