Only One Purpose

I am here to admit that I have a problem with pornography. It is more than a problem; it is an addiction. I am addicted to pixels that excite my brain and consume my life. I've tried so hard to beat it. But I keep failing. The longest I've gone is 18 days -- a miracle, personally, and a miracle of life because those 18 days enabled me to have my son.

Yes, you heard that right. I owe my son to NoFap.

He is now turning one year old, and I am embarrassed to count the times I've failed him. Sleeping in his crib, me on my phone, masturbating to pornography. Or he was playing in the living room and I'm on the couch, a blanket hiding me masturbating. These are times when I should be a nurturing, caring, playful father. Even worse, my actions endanger him and his wellbeing.

I've been struggling with pornography for the majority of my life. That is well over a decade. One thing that I've learned is that there will be no quick fixes. I'm hopeful that a "reset" will make it easy, but I also know that more than a decade of learning cannot simply be unlearned. My addiction will always be ready to bounce back.

This is the reason that I see no option than to dedicate my purpose to building a healthy, productive lifestyle centered on NoFap.

8/8/18 -- a date I'll remember forever as the day my purpose in life changed from many to one: NoFap.

I'm here for the long journey. I'm excited to begin Day 1.

 

Thank you for the welcome. I'm here to make my son proud -- he may not know the details, but I will make sure he feels the difference. His "NoFap" father will be involved, engaged, playful, and thoughtful. I will be a better father with NoFap.

 

Thank you. I am so glad to be back on NoFap. It was this kind of support that really made the different to me a year ago, and I hope that I never leave again.