Not sure if this is a problem...

Hello everyone.

I would like to share my story relating to pornography and masturbation.

I have started watching porn for almost a year now, and I was reading up on the side effects of pornography and masturbation. PM, if you will.

When I first discovered pornography, I was amazed by the fantasy and imagination. It wasn’t a porn video, but when I watched a video that aroused me, I was searching for more. I first looked at naked girls photos, and not so long after, I started watching videos.

After, I have started my habit of masturbating to porn about 4 times a week. I wasn’t aware of the problems it could cause, but when I stumbled across a website, explaining all the bad things that porn could cause to your daily life, relationships, and changing your brain’s behaviour. I didn’t know you could get addicted to it.

I have heard that when you watch pornography, you keep coming back for more, hardcore versions of porn. But that wasn’t my case. I kept looking at the pictures and videos I used to look at when I first discovered pornography. And also when I look at porn and masturbate to it, it is for maximum 30 minutes. And then I move on. Also I never watch hardcore, or violent porn.

Before I tried to reboot, or found anything about abstaining from porn, my porn use has been reduced. It was around 2 times a week, with the masturbation session even shorter.

Here I am, now trying to reboot. I have found an app called ‘reboot’ on Google Play, and it basically keeps track of how many days you abstained from porn, and motivation, and side effects of porn, quotes, etc. I think it is helping me.

The problem is, I don’t know if I am addicted to porn, or that I just like it. I have read so many things about why porn is bad, yet I find it difficult to cut back for more than 5 days. I keep trying, but end up relapsing. I read literally everything I can, create a new habit, excersise (which I am doing every day), etc. I don’t really have a problem with my daily life with porn, but I am feeling the side effects porn is giving me. So I am confused.

I have just relapsed, so I created an account to let the nofap community know my potential problem. Recently when I masturbate, it is only bikini girls pictures. No video or full nudity. But I have heard that it still counts as porn if you feel the rush of dopamine. And I think about sex when I try to abstain.

Also I am too afraid to tell anyone. I know that it is highly recommended to talk to someone you trust, but I can’t

I really would like to quit, with PMO, but I lack determination. How can one be truly committed to something? I have read the benefits of Nofap, and I have the reasons I want to quit. I know I have self-control, but some tips or motivation would be nice.

Thank you guys.

 

Hello guys, thank you for all the responses.

Here I am, relapsed again. How do I avoid beating myself up because I am a potential addict? Now I have a very STRONG desire to quit porn, masturbation, and orgasm. If I am actually addicted, I will be more ashamed of myself. I really want to quit. But a few days later, I think those thoughts will fade and my sexual desire will increase. Tips?

BTW, how do you reset the PMO tracker?