Hey guys, I'm in on day 6 of noFap. I decided to do it for religious reasons and after going down a slippery slope of increasingly extreme porn fetishes and masturbation habits. My Os were starting to feel pretty weak so I developed some gross habits I'm not proud of. Anyway, enough was enough so I quit cold turkey 6 days ago. I feel like I'm doing pretty good and have a fairly good grasp on it. I've had a couple times where I almost relapsed cause of some videos on YouTube and advertisements but so far so good. Anyway, around the same time, I met this girl who wants to lose her virginity to me. I am also a technical virgin with some experience in other departments so I agreed. I 've heard that FWB relationships are not good for noFap but I told her, I'd like to be in a relationship if it really works out. I have about till the end of this month until we meet and possibly have sex so the excitement is sort of making me nervous and super turned on. So my questions to you guys. I get fantasizing is a no-no. I've found it a bit hard not to fantasize about having sex with her as it's even slipped into my dreams. What exactly do I need to be weary of?
Good hold on! You should figure out if she only wants to have sex to lose her 'virginity' or she really likes you. Also use the energy nofap gives you to do usefull things!
Bingo, yes, I have been focusing on going to the gym every night and excercising. Also have been waking up earlier than I would usually. I have yet to learn if she desires a relationship with me yet as sex was the original reason we've even begun talking. My other question is, does noFap make you last less with sex or has anybody really seen a difference? I'm a bit worried that when I eventually do have sex with this girl, it'll be over in like 2 minutes but I'd assume the energy from noFap might allow a second or third round.
In my opinion you need to save sex for a really meaningful relationship. Without that it is the same as masturbating
Try to focus on what you are trying to do, getting rid of the addiction. If you decide to have sex, worrying about your performance is only counterproductive. Nofap does have the effect you think it has, though focus less on that part, there is so much more in lovemaking. Though this is just my opinion, meaningless sex can be just as dangerous as P, it is addictive and won't make you feel happy.
Hi I am female and my ex had PIED. You say you are stopping for religous reasons not because your are addicted? Are you an addict? I cannot really see the answer from here. And do you want to delay sex because of religion or downright fear for PIED, and is that why you have never had intercourse to date/. I suspect that may be part of the problem. Here’s the thing with new relationships, they cause a ton of stress. PMO addiction is not about sex, it has nothing to do with it. It is a coping mechanism just like alcohol or drugs. When you are first dating you have tons of stress and anxiety. If you have not developed another coping mechanism you will likely turn to PMO. Many a man makes the mistake that PMO is about sex, and that when they get into a relationship, that it will stop but most of the time it only makes it worse. If you have performance anxiety, or you cannot perform in bed, then you will have more stress. In early reboot you have lots of feelings you are dealing with, you don’t need to add rejection to them. And now not only do you have your own feelings to deal with, you have hers as well. Yes most women want sex in a relationship. But most women also want honesty. My advice,which most addicts detest on here is that you need to tell her about your reboot and your past issues if you are going to continue in the relationship. First, it will lower your anxiety. If she knows you may have issues in bed and why, then she can work with you and help you through this, but also if you continue to have issues and you all end up in a long term relationship then she will most likely feel lied to, in th at you did not disclose your issues prior to things getting serious, that is not fair and you do not want to be that guy to her. My advice to addicts recovering is complete a minimum hard reboot of 90 days before you even think about starting a new relationship, a year is actually best. Your addiction is going to cause very serious issues in a relationship and I am not sure you realize this now. Even if you do not consider yourself an addict, if you have PIED or the early phases of it, that’s going to be a problem with a partner. You are also in my opinion not ready to date until you are ready to be honest.
I decided to stop just because I was getting into some really shameful and physically destructive masturbatory habits. I also stopped because of religious reasons although that one is a bit less now, you could say I am a religious man and I made a promise to god I'd quit porn and masturbation. Also not being able to O without M was a concern as well, prior. Well, I certainly acknowledge that I have an addiction but I think I decided to stop before it got as bad as it could have gotten. I don't have a whole lot of PIED, I don't have a problem rising to the occasion in a situation with a real woman, I think I'm heading into a flatline or my dopamine is starting to regulate, however. I'm finding that when I'm in a sexual situation with a woman, I don't immediately won't to touch her or do anything sexual with her, like a couple days ago. Even if she starts doing sexual things, sure its arousing but I don't necesarrily want to do anything sexual. I'm actually very grateful that noFap has allowed me to do that. I actually had my first O not too long ago that wasn't from M and it was an amazing, freeing feeling. I had struggled with the deathgrip syndrome in the past. I have talked to this girl about my decision to noFap. She's okay with it or at least has not raised any concerns. I don't find myself thinking about any of the porn videos I've watched over the years, or any of the disgusting fetishes ive been into when I'm intimate with any woman so I guess so far so good. I will certainly keep your information in mind though.
