Hi to all Fapstronauts and Femstronauts, my name is Stefan. I am 21 years old and I want to quit masturbating. For a few years now I feel urge to stop, I tried few times but I always failed and came back to porn again. In recent time I found many bad things about myself that I think are the products of porn and masturbation addiction. Constant shame, regret, bad mood, no motivation, low self esteem, no confidence at all, physically weaker, fatigue and exhausted, sleepy, lazy, easily triggered, no focus. Few weeks ago I went to hospital because I had increased blood pressure. With 21 years I have very increased blood pressure!! Porn is ruining me and over the years I started to watch more "extreme porn" (at least I consider it more extreme). I have a girlfriend for a few years and I want to have a healthy sexual life with her even tho I have no erectile problems, but my bad mood, lack of confidence and no motivation is not something I want her to see. Besides that I am on college and in a crossroad of my life. I want to have good grades and be more focused but I am struggling with that even tho I like what I study. Just want to finish college, have knowledge, go far in my career, build my own life and future with my girl and overall have better and healthier life. Sorry if this is long and I am happy to be here with many others who have same problem. I wish luck to everyone on this site. Hope you all succeed and have better life that you always wanted! Feel free to ask anything.
Hey how are you Stefan, I read your post and we have a lot in common. I also have a girlfriend of a few years and go to college as well (graduate next month). I agree with you, I as well just want to live a healthier life. I wish you the best of luck on this journey and just know there’s a lot of people out there struggling with this as well you aren’t alone.
Hey Positive Outlook, thanks for responding, I appreciate your reply! Thanks for understanding and it is nice to meet someone with similar problems. I hope that you and I can get thru this so that we can finally have a life that we always wanted. Porn is the worst thing ever, very dangerous and it should be treated as real addiction. If you need any help, advice or just wanna talk about life because we have many things in common feel free to message me I would be happy to help!
Welcome. Glad you are here. Take some time to read the reboot material and come up with a plan for what you will do when you are faced with urges. It has good advice, so don't skip it! Perhaps start writing a journal - if you feel comfortable telling people about happened and what's going on now, you will start to feel accountable to them. You may even inspire others. It's a nice feeling! This will help your recovery. Also, IRL, try to add something into your life that makes you the kind of person who doesn't engage in PMO. Think about doing: Something you enjoy Something you're good at Something important Something for somebody else, without thought of reward (and if you DO get an unintended reward, do something ELSE, perhaps for a different person or group). Read the journals of others - we all learn from each other. For example, I received the above good advice from a far more experienced member of the community who shared his knowledge. Don't just stay within your own age group or part of the world. Read, learn, apply. Look around the forums, get to know people. Everyone is friendly, and will try to support you. We're all in the same boat here. Be kind to others and others will be kind to you, both here and IRL. I wish you a successful reboot.
Thank you so much for replying. Very nice said. Especially for helping others. It is the best feeling ever, feeling of real happiness. I will try my best to engage with others and help. I just started and I am trying my best to distract my mind. I have a lot to study these days, beginning to exercise constantly. Also bought a notebook for my journal and will start with writing these days. Thanks again for your kind words, I will remember your advices and I will try my best to engage with others, help them and spread a happiness and positivity.
