Hey nofap community. Anyone have any success stories with this topic? practical day to day tips? what do you do when see someone attractive? I have no desire to watch porn anymore -however I feel like Im literally in the process of finalizing transforming my mind to not see people as objects sexually attractive (not thaT I think of people necessarily that way but in terms of release or whatever it is?). What to focus on instead or say to self or how re-wire brain on this? Open to ideas! I want to free my mind. thank you.
It has happened to a lot of us. It'd be useful to remember they're just flesh and blood with a skeleton. There's no difference between the skeleton of a beautiful person or any other. All in our mind...we weave these fantasies around ourselves...
CONGRATULATIONS ON 49 DAYS OF SUCCESS !!!!!!! GOOD JOB !!!!!!! How about ... if you think she's attractive...your type...you have the time... then go & say something like "Hi, how are you today?" If you're her type .......(you can tell by smiles.... questions....interest....time... etc.) .......Great. If you find something about her you don't like (or) discern that you're not her type... then you positively "MOVE ON" to your other *187,999,998 options of other women on earth! *That is a VERY ACCURATE number re: the number of options you have (i.e. women your age or up to 5 years younger; true for all men.) You'll be very happy and encouraged if you write this number down etc. I did and put it on a new, big envelope above the computer -- very positive Something that is true for all men [in a positive, responsible way]: the world is your playground.
It's hard to look away when you see an attractive person! Either I'll jump on the opportunity and talk to them (usually to be reminded that there is truly more to people than meets the eye) or try to occupy my mind with another person or thing to do.
I look at the ground and think, "Wow! There sure are some beautiful people around. I'm not going to lust, not going to lust, not going to lust." Then I start thinking about projects I have, how am I going to pay for my next trip, what do I need to do next in order to make my daily goals, or anything that's non-sexual and not about the woman I just saw.
yeh it is really tough out there. back in the day it was only the guys that hit on girls. now its just nuts lol. people just cant help but stare. ive become a pro at staring at the floor or reading ads when on a packed bus or train
Seeing people as sexual objects is not the same thing as finding someone sexually attractive. In fact, porn conditions us to be highly attracted to virtual women (sensitization) and less attracted real women (desensitization). Being sexually attracted to someone in real life is actually a pretty good indicator that your brain has successfully rewired itself. There's no need to feel bad, feeling sexual attraction towards attractive people is normal and healthy. It's how we propagate the human race. Just be aware of the Chaser effect... sexual attraction to real women can cause that and lead to relapse... especially if the woman is dressed provocatively.
marriage is like a shield for me. knowing that if i start gazing at random women or try to chat them up, then i am betraying my wife. hope i dont come across as arrogant or anything, but when i do notice provocatively dressed women, i just think of them as shallow, just wanting to be valued for their looks. whatever u make of it, it helps me avoid them.