JK we dont have a dog anymore, we had to give her back to the pound because she kept crying because we locked her in a garage.
Well it was a shed, and it wasnt my dog. It was my little brothers but he's a fat stuborn little douche bag
That is rough man, I'm sorry to hear it. Based on your profile picture I'm gonna guess you are a follower of Christ. Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. All I can encourage you to do today is to lean into His promise. He is a good and loving God who cares deeply and personally for each and every one of us. When we weep He weeps 10,000 time more. All we can do is trust in Him and do our best to remain obedient to His will. This day take some time to care for yourself. Engage in an activity that brings you peace and helps to distract you from your troubles. Go out in the sun (hopefully it's sunny where you are) and enjoy the beauty of the world; marvel in the sheer artistry of the world around us. Spend time with a friend. As hard as it might seem, find something today that will help to ease your heartache. Depression is a place where the enemy thrives and where our addiction will consume us. You must fight back. For you, for your wife, and for your future.
Day 10 I am now into double digits. It has been a really long time since I have abstained from porn for this long...and 10 days really isn't much. Within the last 24 hours my biggest struggle has been dealing with images popping into my mind and the lure of what material could be on my "favorite" sites right now. These are simple, but powerful attacks. No matter how many times I chase them from my mind, I know that each time it poisons me a little more. My only recourse it to come here and place my thoughts down, to read what other have written, and to reenforce why I am doing this. This struggle is not about just not using porn. This is about reclaiming my life. This is about freeing myself from bondage and becoming who I need to be. This is about removing the poison from my life and from my family. I don't just need to stop using porn, I need to heal who I am as a person.
Day 0 again. Feeling so hopeless, don't know what to do... seriously frustrating, leaves such immense self hate.
What to do: Try again. You messed up, yes that sucks. However, "Success is not built on success. Not great success. Great success is built on failure, frustration, even catastrophe." -Sumner Redstone Failure is only failure if you learn nothing from it. Learn what you did wrong this time and use that knowledge to shore up your defenses. This is a war. You have lost a battle, but as long as you draw breath you can win the war.