New - Sexual Identity Confusion Ruining Life

it said on the site that some p mode is just giving up porn, you can still masturbate, just without using porn.
i'm panicking, in my journal thread i was more specific, but im not going to last the night at this rate. I'm pretty much fully erect and leaking at the slightest thought or accidental bump of the pants..

 

luckily i started playing a game with a friend and the worst of it has passed - It got so bad a couple of times i was actually masturbating a little, i wouldn't call it edging, but it was leaking everywhere on its own and i really had to do something. I managed to get my hands off it and haven't orgasmed.

No unfortunately due to other problems i'm unemployed and not in a situation where i can get out much, i play some sport weekly when i can but it's mostly straight male dominated (and although i am attracted a little to more feminine men IRL, the majority of my attraction is porn related)

Im managing again for now but I'm yet to try going to sleep and that was hard enough last night.

However I just hit 5 days without MO and 6 without Porn. (I think i set the counter up right, i put the start date as 00:00 on the 24th, so in theory it should change to 5 right now but hasnt)

I'm feeling that this is a success really, and if i have to fap I will. I won't use porn and don't have a need or compulsion to use it, for me this is more of a self esteem and confidence thing. It may turn out simply only masturbating when my body wants me to rather than when i am bored (and out of the habit of TESTING for straightness) is the real success for me.

We'll see. To everyone, thanks for the replies.

 

my counter won't reset to 0, any ideas why? (accidently set it to last month it shows 30 for me)