Started on August 22. PMO feels like a distant memory now. I'd say I'm better where I am now than where I was, but nofap doesn't fix everything. Still feels like there's something missing in my life. I should probably do something to celebrate reaching my goal, but I don't have the energy for it. Anyway, for those of you considering starting this, you should. It won't fix everything, but it'll help.
Porn was just a way to fill the emptiness in your life. Now you decided to stop, you need to find something else to fill the gap. Do you have some ideas on this area?
No, honestly, I have no idea. I used to play a lot of video games too to fill the time but I don't as much anymore since I'm not enjoying them very much. I go to school, come back home, cook and that's pretty much what I do every day. Sleep like 10-11 hours per day and when I'm not sleeping I just browse stuff online I guess. When I'm at school I wish I was at home, and when I'm at home I wish I was at school.
Hey, congratulations on your achievement! That's insane, I'm really proud of you lol. You sound ilttle depressed and jaded though. In your journal you mentioned that another goal of yours it to lose 80 pounds. Maybe you should take up jogging or swimming, or something like that? Hitting the gym seems like a cliche, but nevertheless it's a very cool way of spending time and you can meet some friendly people there. Not to mention that after any of these activities you'll feel exhausted and uplifted at the same time as the endorfines, etc. will be rushing through your blood. Keep up the great work!
Yeah it's funny you mention that, I went from 350 pounds to 180 2015-2016, but I took a lot of it back (60lbs), now I'm trying again. I've got a gym in my mom's basement and I know how much it helps me mentally, but I have a hard time maintaining a calorie deficit and working out (almost passed out my last 3 work outs and then stopped). Considering going jogging though.
I'm not quite sure what that means, but no I haven't. I don't have the faith unfortunately, sometimes I wish I did.
90 days is great, I'm new here, Im just on day 3. I hope to make it to 90 days, I done 60 days a few times but i always relapse.
Hey Man Congratulations on your achievement. I agree that it is not a one solution fix all thing but is a great triumph.
I am making assumptions here as I have not read any of your previous posts before this one, but could it be some underlying issue or self defeating belief that is ingrained in your subconscious that you are not aware of? For me, PMO just covered the fact that subconsciously I believed I was not good enough and it ate my self esteem away. This, I came to discover after a lot of soul searching. This underlying belief that was imprinted in my childhood has caused endless failures in school, university, at work, in relationships and has led to on and off depression. I am now working constantly on overcoming this belief through character development and accomplishing small goals that help me to cultivate the belief that I am capable. I am still struggling though with this. I initially thought it would take a short time to overcome this belief but it is a constant work in progress at the moment. I accomplished a long streak during the year but it did not change my overall feelings. There were just fleeting emotions of euphoria initially which quickly disappeared because I was not addressing the real problem. Also, PMO suppresses feelings such as worthlessness, loneliness, frustration etc and when one goes a long time without PMO, those feelings come to the fore and it is hard to deal with them. I now believe that measuring success just by only looking at abstinence days may be superficial. Measuring success should be much more holistic and take into considerations things like improvement in motivation, character, accomplishing life goals and so on. I hope you can discover what is really bothering you or underlying so that you can address it.
Yes I can definitely understand you. It's tough to let go of pmo, but without replacing it with another addiction is the key to success. Just think about your aim in life....maybe imagine yourself a few years in the future and work towards it. Imagine yourself physically, emotionally, financially and just work man! You'll definitely find some meaning for your life. Good luck man
first off congratulations!! 90 days IS a HUGE accomplishment. i agree with lots of what is said in others posts. not filling time with other activities will eventually lead you back to porn out of boredom. even being online will lead you to porn or sexy pictures etc and that will lead you back. i have have one device that has internet and that is a work laptop. smartphone is now dumb..... i would personally never suggest swimming or the gym as the workout and swimsuits will definately trigger my mind. i would suggest the YMCA if i was going to use a gym. another thing is get out of moms house. your daily struggles could be because you dont feel grown up?? just a thought. find an apartment in an active part of town and join life. get out of your fantasy world and meet and interact with flesh and bone. pixels are not real and pron stars are not doing it out of love for their craft. they are forced into it for various reasons. money drugs forced etc. i wish you well and stay strong. PORN is NOT REAL
Bro I completely understand where you are coming from. I also recently hit 90 days and still have a feeling of emptiness. We have to find a hobby or something that helps fill that void. Recently ive been going to the gym much more frequently and drawing. You need an outlet. Do some research on hobbies that you might enjoy like video editing, some sort of art, boxing, etc etc Whatever it takes we cannot go back to that life bro
It's been 6 days now, I'm feeling the urges to do it...but I really don't want to..I'm not going to do it ...it's not going to happen
I was trying to think of a worthy response, but I couldn't have said this better myself. Although I'm not a PA, I numbed myself in various ways until I addressed my underlying feelings. Now, I want to feel! Even when it's difficult, it's worth it because we can't select which feelings we're numbing. We can't feel true happiness and joy if we've numbed ourselves. My bf is a PA, and we both agree the # of abstinent days is just a piece of the puzzle. As his CSAT says, PA is a symptom of a bigger problem. Congrats on 92 days now, @Byris! I truly hope you find your joy in life.
@Byris hey congrats on completing 90 days !! Thanks for sharing how you feel !! Most of us filled our emptiness, sadness, frustration etc with PM so now that we've left it, it certainly will leave us with a void !! So like everyone else here suggested, fill it with healthy, meaningful habits!!