Post published by RockTheHill
I'd like to share a positive experience I had today. Now, full disclosure: I'm working through day 4 of a reboot, and I've done better before, so I'm still as broken as anybody else. HOWEVER: one of the benefits I see is that as I work through a reboot I notice beauty apart from sexual beauty. Before I got serious about fixing my lust issue, I really only saw women in two categories: sexually attractive and not sexually attractive. However, since I've been pushing my clean spells longer and longer, I find myself noticing other kinds of beauty. Today at mass, for example, I saw an elderly woman (whom I found in no way attractive) with an incredibly beautiful wedding ring. For a solid minute or so I simply contemplated the ring, the way the gold shone and the gems were arranged and it occurred to me that I've never just looked at a beautiful ring and appreciated it before. Similarly, I find I can see a woman in a nice dress and appreciate that she is well dressed, analogous to noticing a nice painting or something, without giving in to lustful thoughts. Now, it's a better place to be, but I admit I still have my struggles (see: Day 4). Nonetheless, it's an important benefit and I'd like to know if any of you have seen the same thing. I think we sometimes get so caught up in the 'mea culpa' that we forget that there's a positive side to our struggle.