Almost PMOd tonight. Got close and started edging and then backed away. It was good to turn myself around for once and stop. Many times I just give in.
It’s tough when I start getting edgy emotionally and physically and I resist PMO, sometimes it’s hard not to be anxious and my wife feels it in my words. It’s an annoying loop where she gets upset at me being annoyed by small things and then I act out to go tolerate both. Still sober and trying.
It sucks so much when the physical urge comes. I get more prone to fantasize and also have sexual dreams.
Hello friends - a thought on "edging"...for me engaging in this behavior results in the same bad feelings (shame, guilt, loss of self-esteem) as PMO to completion. I try hard to slow down my response to the trigger that leads to getting started on the path to edge mode. Increasing awareness of the moment-to-moment wrong choices gives me a chance at turning things around before acting out occurs. Stay strong everyone.
Day 6 - staying vigilant for chaser effect while continuing intimacy with wife. The next step in dealing with my addiction to PMO. Slowly getting the strength to engage with the wife and build the wall to compartmentalize my addiction so that IRL sexuality doesn't get my mind chasing P imagery, memories, and old bad habits. Just trying hard right now.
One week. Tonight I went for a run when the urges were strong. I didn’t go on my computer until I had a specific plan. When I finished that I stepped away from the computer. My member still feels like it wants release. I must not give in. I want recovery and freedom from PMO more than I want the temporary pleasure.
Got through last night. Today is feeling better physically. I know urges will come. In the past every other day has been rough with urges. I have one week and that’s a good feeling. We will do this.
Day 8 - some stressful stuff hitting me the last few days. What used to be my natural response - go to PMO - isn't any longer. I think of that self as a different man. I can hardly imagine falling into my old PMO routine. Seeing that image of myself grosses me out. I am thankful for this site and to everyone here for the help. I know the addict is still in me, so will stay aware and not let my guard down.
Good work man! My check in: super stressed at work but handling it better through meditation. Very few urges the last two days and that’s so nice.
How are you all my friends, unfortunately i had a relapse couple of days ago, after hitting my longest streak of 36 days, now i'm back to day 2 and i still feel the change that happened to me in those PMO free 36 days, and i started a new streak hoping to achieve my goal of having a free PMO life, stay strong every one.
Day 2. Managed to fight off urges yesterday, which was good. Normally, especially in recent times, I would have just succumbed but I managed to use some willpower and get through it.