It is with great sadness that after 96 days I messed up. It wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be. Am I happy I made it this far? Yes. I’m proud of myself for that achievement. Today I start back at 0 ready to come back and do better. Let’s do this!!!
I got lazy this weekend and fell back on old habits. I’m happy I beat my longest streak by a day, but I’m disappointed I gave in to the addiction again. Cannot wallow in self pity though. Need to pick myself back up and start over. Back to Day 0.
I think I'm going to have to cut out social media mostly or even entirely. I've noticed that a lot of the time when I go onto social media I'm subconsciously fishing for some sort of P-Sub to get a rush. A lot of the time I don't even realise this until I see something triggering. From now on, I'll have to only use YouTube when I have something I expressly want to look up / watch, and all other social media should be thrown out entirely.
Day 01: Feeling a little low after my relapse. Need to remember this feeling every time the addiction tries to make me give in.
I don't want to feel remorse and ashamed to be relapsed after abstaining for a couple of weeks the reason was I haven't changed the way I was living from the time I was addicted to porn back then. I was being lazy waking up late afternoons and not taking care of myself and personal interests and unable to do what I wanted and always laying at a bed as a lazy sloth and daydreaming. so I haven't created a new life and all the factors which brought me to porn caught me again. but I don't want to give up and I want to work my butt off to work hard and train hard and being in this forum and looking at my fellow brothers gives me the courage to not back down and get up and go forward. so day 1 completed successfully
Day 4 down... I have been tempted many times today, but if I can make it through tonight I'll be sober the longest I've been in a fair while.