SO, for us guys that fapped and lose our vital energies, are we doomed to have done permanent damage and be less than our potential selves (had we not fapped ever)? Like, I can't help but think that I am never going to be at the level that I could have been in my life had I never masturbated. Screw this addiction to hell.
I have a phrase Nothing is impossible nor absolute. It may be, technically, scientifically, but the belief that it is not impossible is stronger than anything I don't think we are doomed. 1-2 years off of PMO is a lot of exercice but you'll be free. And I believe as this addiction doesn't come from a material abuse, the damage isn't permanent.
The damage can multiply and "deepen" heck even lengthen though. Nothing in this world is permanent. Not even the rivers and mountains. But I know what you mean
I know I am doomed if I don't keep this progress going. Nice thought. I guess choosing optimism is best.
Guys I really need your help cause I'm going through some fucked up confusion due to a nail fetish I've always had So whenever I see a makeup artist guy or girl and has nails on I'll always get aroused when noticing the nails. But then when I try thinking of having sexual intercouse with these people I cannot get aroused and may only get minor swelling of the penis. This has lead me to be really confused as I'm not sure if it's an indication that I like guys or not Also whenever I see something that's gay or see gay makeup artists I'll get very minimal reactions, however once I switch the thoughts to women or nails I'll instantly get aroused and can ejaculate with seconds.. However when just trying to masturbate to women without viewing this content it takes ages to ejaculate please elaborate for me. As I'm not sure wether I'm gay or straight Thanks
That thought for me is a loop. I feel I'm not good enough, strong enough, worth enough. And the way to show me some care, some cheering has been through the sensations of PM. But the doomness that comes from it reinforces the idea of being inferior, worthless. For sure we'd be different without this addiction. But we're not worthless. We're showing ourselves that we are strong, valious men, with a history that would have a good meaning through our actions from the present. From this very big effort that we're sharing through quitting PM.
I'm 54. There are 1,000,001 things that I could have done differently in my life that would have made me a better man now. @Ravefist, is it worth my time fretting about them? There's a Chinese proverb that reads
I just said this in another thread but I think it applies here also. You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and become mentally stronger. Easier said than done but if you start right now it can be achieved. I started with following a strict routine, maintaining a good diet, intermittent fasting, exercise and meditation. I've managed to strengthen my prefrontal cortex in quite a short space of time. This improves impulse control which makes it easier to say no to things, including pmo.
Thanks everyone for your insight. God bless. I looked in the mirror today and really don't like what I see. Could have been so different, but my life took this turn.
I'm kind on the same page. For me it's like I feel so inferior. But I see me in the mirror and it's different. I see a regular person, like whoever else. It's just my mind telling me all the time I'm worthless. When actually I'm not.
I used to feel the same as what you’re saying, like no matter what all hope was lost. Now however I feel differently. First, we can never truly know what our life would have been like, any thought we have about it is fantasy (oddly enough just like our pm behaviour is like is acting out a fantasy; I think this is part of why we seem to build up these ideas of what could have been). Second, our efforts to bring good things into our lives may actually make us better than what we would have been had we never known the addiction (not saying it’s good that we are addicted by the way). Because we have decided to work on this and fight against this we add such good behaviours to our lives such as exercise, meditation, building and maintaining healthy relationships not built on lust, supporting others, etc. The list could go on for all the things that a lot of us can and do add to make our lives better so that there is no room for porn or masturbation. Third, I believe we have a capacity for improved compassion that can be lacking in the world today. We have a weakness and so when we see others’ weaknesses we don’t judge them so quickly and are willing to help. Some of the people I esteem the highest are those that have fought and to some extent have overcome the addiction. Our past is already spent so it’s not worth worrying about it (google the sunk cost fallacy and think about how this applies to our situation) but we have today and tomorrow to do what we desire and there is so much we can do good for ourselves and others. Don’t give up hope, we are in this together.
Totally get it but eventually the more you work on yourself the more you may see yourself as others. Every single person on planet earth has a struggle they are facing. If you have compassion on others then you definitely should have compassion on yourself. We are broken sure, however I’ve never met someone who wasn’t so it’s not worth beating ourselves up over it.
There are no gains without pains. Improvement is relatively straight forward for most people. An exercise plan, lot and lots of healthy exercise. No junk food. Cut back on caffeine, etc.. Limit internet access to safe places. Replace bad habits with good ones. A day at a time and you will see improvement. I am a Christian and believe that Jesus Christ can cure any condition.
Sure. Simply put, any time you get a craving and you refrain from giving into it, you are improving your impulse control. Or in other words strengthen your prefrontal cortex. Saying no to something you know you don't want to do helps also. If you can train yourself to be very assertive in everything you do, be strict with what you eat and set a routine for yourself that MUST be completed daily, you will have a stronger prefrontal cortex. Everyone doing nofap should be working in this, in my opinion.
Stop Scareing people with your symptoms go to doctor or talk to priest ask God for forgiveness and pray
Ive been fapping like once a month between 2018 thru Nov 2019 Since Nov 3rd, 2019, I fapped almost 3-4 times a week, with a few weeks where I fapped 6-7